1+1 makes 4

5 hours of sleep.

2011-04-20T05:48:00.001-07:00

I have got to stop it with the insomnia. My brain goes 200 miles per hour and I can't seem to rest at night. I have so much I want to accomplish and just not enough hours in the day.... so I try to create more hours.... which leaves me exhausted about 70% of the time.

.... which is also why, other than Zach..... Mountain Dew & Maxwell House are my best friends.

Anyway. one of my grand ideas a couple of weeks ago was to rejuvenate our bib drawer. our bibs are (were) really old, ratty, and stained. After 2 years of Carter spitting & spewing on them... and then Clover starting to use them too.... they've had their fair share of use and it showed. I was tired of being a little grossed out by old ugly bibs everytime I opened that drawer and who wants to spend money on bibs of all things?

not this mama.

So. I thought I would make some in all of my free time. Because you know I am running on an abundance of free time lately (this is sarcasm incase you hadn't already assumed).

It only took me a few days of finding minutes here & there.... and I think Zach grew a little tired of moving the sewing machine from our kitchen table everytime we sat down to eat.... but I did make some new bibs.

This was my first attempt at "pebble quilting"... or at least I think this is what it's called. Nevermind the name though... it's not perfect but it worked out somehow. My machine & I worked it out. Well.... mostly the machine. I just twirled the fabric around in circles.
I love how wrinkly crinkly they get after a wash & dry.... makes them look like they're soft & well-loved.

They are ready for their sweet potatoes. Hopefully they'll last through Clover's teething. She slobbers more than any baby I've ever seen.

Dear Clover . 8 months

2011-04-16T07:09:00.000-07:00

Oh goodness Clover.... Did you know that you are the love of my life? What on earth did we ever do without you in our house!? You are the sweetest little munchkin ever ever ever. I LOVE your big chunky cheeks & your huge wide-0pen-mouthed smile.... and the way that those big precious blue eyes light up when you see mama. You're absolutely PERFECT! I love to squeeze you tight, kiss your little cheeks, nuzzle your little neck, and hold you close to me in the rocking chair every morning after you wake up.

Mornings are our special time together.... you've been getting up lately between 7:30 and 8.... and Carterbug doesn't wake up until 9:30 or 10 so we have lots of special alone time to enjoy together everyday. I can't believe how quickly you've gone from being my teeny tiny little newborn girl to being such a chunky, full-of-life, rolly-poly baby. You're growing everyday more and more and the little things that you are doing astound me. I'm in awe at how quickly you are catching onto things.... and when you do the most simple of tasks- I find myself wanting to jump up and down and wave my arms frantically, which sometimes happen. You are clapping your hands, dancing, and starting to give kisses. You are also jabbering the cutest of words constantly. You talk all day long, most often saying "dada-dada-dada-dada-dada". I try to get you to say "mama" and you just stare at me. I guess you want to save the best for last.

You are INTRIGUED to say the least, with your brother. You watch him all the time. If he is in the room- your eyes are on him and I'm not sure if it's because you're afraid he is going to throw a truck at your head or if it's because you are just fascinated with how well he gets from one place to the next. You have NO interest in moving. You are a very lazy, stationary little girl.... rarely moving much of anywhere. You prefer to just sit in one spot and have everything be given to you- which is fine for now. As much as Carter destroys the playroom on his own, I hardly think we need another moving tornado in the room with him. You love to just sit, look around, and take everything in. I could sit and watch you for hours. Your innocence and fascination with the smallest things inspire me to be a better person, a better mommy, and to work even harder on my relationship with God. You are SO beautiful in every sense of the word. At 8 months, you love:

to be held and snuggled- i could carry you around all day long and that would be perfect as far as you are concerned. sometimes I just carry you on my hip while I clean or cook.... and you love it.

to watch Mickey Mouse with Carter. You are fascinated by the colors and it doesn't matter where you are or what you are doing when the theme song comes on- your little eyes light up and you look straight at the television. Lately... you've even started dancing, which is awesome, awesome, awesome to see.

to eat. You love baby food and you love to be fed. The sloppier, the better. The other day, I stepped away from your high chair for a minute and Carter grabbed your spoon and your baby food and started feeding you.... it was perfect and adorable until he assumed that you could just finish it up yourself and he handed you the spoon. Needless to say- we had quite the mess to clean up and you ended up in the bathtub. He hasn't quite figured out yet that you are a baby and there are certain things you can't do and can't eat.... he is always trying to share his popcorn and chicken nuggets with you.

music. You LOVE music. As soon as I turn on the music in the playroom- you are moving all over the place. You bob your little head, kick your legs, raise your arms up and down.... it's obvious that you prefer things not be too quiet....

dada & Carter- you are smitten with those boys. Though you prefer to stay perched on mama's hip..... you love to stare at your daddy and your brother. They are definitely the objects of your affection. I can't wait to see you interact with them more as you get older.

chewing. You chew everything. And you slobber everywhere.

There are SO SO many other little things about you that we love and adore.... these are just a few.....

Thank you for being such a precious girl! God did an incredible job with you.... I am so excited to watch you grow!

Love you Clover, Clove, Clovie, Clovie-Wovie, Clovergirl, sweetiepie.....

Love always & always & always..... Mama

aw, shucks.

2011-04-04T18:34:00.001-07:00

well.

I guess it's been awhile.

and here's why.

you see.... we've been sick. all of us have been sick....

both babies were very sick last week. Clove= double pneumonia, bilateral ear infection, strep throat. Carter= pneumonia in the left lung, very high fevers, bilateral ear infection, possible strep.

it was quite miserable for a few days as they were tired and uncomfortable and Zach and I were starting to develop some symptoms of our own. But- as you well know.... mama's and daddies do not get sick days.

but thankfully- Zach did get to stay home a few days and we all weathered under the weather, together. and we had lost of sweet moments like this in all of the sickness:

and we were more thankful than ever before for this chalkboard in the mudroom because the babies were both on different meds at different times with different doses. it was overwhelming to say the very least trying to keep track of it all.

and if you look really close- the mattress in the bedroom is gone. that's because it's in the living room floor where we all slept for nearly a week. piled on a mattress in the living room floor. and it was actually really nice, awful as it sounds. I actually sorta thought about moving the bed out there for good. But then I laughed and forgot about it.
.... and this is the only time that THIS happened:most of the time- this little man was all "I hate breathing treatments" and it would have probably been easier to deliver a baby elephant into the world than to get him to sit still long enough to get his treatments completed.

but this one afternoon.... he not only sat still.... he held the mask. and I ran to get the camera because the mother in me knew that this was a once in a lifetime event. and I was right.

and then one sunny day..... when we were all feeling better..... Clover & I posed for a picture and Zach & I took Carter on a date to go see Madagascar Live.

and both were equally as great because I am rarely on the other side of the camera and Carter loved the show.

I finally went to the doctor today and got checked out. I've been ignoring myself for too long, I guess. It turns out that I have a sinus infection, an ear infection in my right ear, the start of one in the left ear, and thrush. Good thing I made that trip.... because I would have continued to get worse without antibiotics.

So now- we are all finally on the mend.

And we are looking forward to warmer weather because we need to get out of the house and play! We need more beautiful moments like these:He looks like such a big boy because he is a big boy. Those boots are size 10. The website recommended that I order him size 6 based on his age. HAHAHAHAHAHA. I think those might have been a tad small.

His summer & fall wardrobe showed up on the doorstep the other day and when I opened the box, I figured out quickly that I would need to exchange EVERY piece of clothing as the 4t's just are not big enough. Carter is ready for a size 5t. And I just cannot wrap my head around that. He turned 2 less than 6 weeks ago. My big big boy. :(

anyway.... no tears tonight. He is growing & I am thankful for that. He will have some super cute size 5t clothes and I am thankful for that.

Life is good. God is good. We are doing so well here.... just thankful to be here and to be where we are. We're blessed beyond measure and trying to soak up all the sweetness in every bit of the way. I'm glad this sick spell is coming to an end and we can all be happy, have fun again, get outside, enjoy some sunshine, and make some more memories.

Thanks for checking in.... I'm off to sew! The babies are in bed, Zach is playing poker, and I am itching to make something cute. :)

book-making & cabin fever cures....

2011-03-18T13:43:00.000-07:00

i'm here.

been very busy. of course. as always. no surprise there.

soaking up all the little bits i can with these two precious growing babies.

and in all my free time (which is not much).... i am making books. scrapbooks, memory books.... people call them different things, do them different ways.

i am working on a couple of digital ones right now.... digital, meaning that they are all put together on the computer.... and then printed with a printing company into an actual hardcover book. which is wonderful and beautiful.

here's the latest page i put together in carter's book: thought I would share this afternoon since i have been pretty well m.i.a this week. {click on it to make it larger and scroll down to read the journaling}The journaling reads:

after your birthday party.... i watched, teary eyed, as you explored in the backyard. so full of wonder and curiousity, love and beauty. you climbed onto your tricycle and pushed it all over and i couldn't help but wonder.... how quickly that tricycle will become a car.

it won't be long and we'll be celebrating sixteen instead of just two....

and while i love to watch you grow, i hate it just the same.

it's too fast. too fleeting. you're too big. you're too smart. you're a baby, not a boy.

this world is full of terrible things that i fear you will be exposed to all too soon.... and i just want to to shelter and protect you forever. but that isn't possible is it?

someday.... i will have to let you go....

but the beautiful truth is that you will soar. you will do great things in this life. God will help you to develop into an incredible boy.... and one day, into an incredible man.... and i look forward to seeing what our heavenly father has in store for you, sweet boy.

oh, the possibilities. we all have so much to be thankful for and so much to look forward to in this life....

this beautiful weather has forced us outside into the yard where we've been clearing brush to make room for a new swing-set & a big sandbox and we've been pulling the wagon around the yard with two babies inside. we've played in the creek and taken apart cattails and picked up sticks. all the fun spring stuff that we have been longing to do for weeks.... and carter is finally finding the cure for his cabin fever. i snapped this picture of him the other night in the yard.... and i don't think i need to mention that i love it.

i think it's perfect. not perfectly exposed or in perfect composition.... but the boots, the messy hair, the stick, the creek... the moment was captured perfectly.

carterbug exploring. being his sweet, little two year old self. so curious.

i LOVE him to pieces.

i'll be back soon with more pictures and more words.... thanks for checking in on us! ~ J.

ps:

have to share this because it is TOO cute. if you have already seen it- you should watch it again.... if you haven't- i hope it makes you smile today: (oh- and you will have to scroll ALL the way down to the bottom of the page to pause my blog music so that you can hear it. it's worth it- i promise!)

learning....

2011-03-07T14:05:00.001-08:00

.... that reglan makes me sad so i stopped taking it today. was warned by the doc that this may happen.... and it has.... and i have no room for sadness. so here's to happy days again.

...............

.... that this picture makes me smile. big huge smiles. and i love what it says. will quite possibly be having this framed for little man's room:

...............

.... that this is so true. especially for me. especially today:

..................

Have lots of creative ideas stockpiling lately in my brain. There are photos I want to take, scrapbook pages to make, quilts to finish up.... the list goes on. I'm overwhelmed with all of these beautiful project ideas and I'm figuring out how to take them one at a time and be happy with the little bits of accomplishment as they happen. God is teaching me that I can't do it all as quickly as I'd like.... and I can be thankful for that realization.

I want to remember....

2011-03-03T21:51:00.001-08:00

carterbug . at the driving range . spring 2010 . 15 months old

Things are very blurry around here.

This house is just a fast moving blur of bottles and diapers and megablocks.... a loud mix of "mama" and "dada" and "honey- I need your help".

Most days- I haven't a clue what day of the week it is.... or even what year it is.... or what my middle name is.

Most days- I'm doing well to get a shower and brush my teeth twice.

Our chalkboard is always adorned with checkboxes & to-do's & my mind is overflowing with good intentions.

and I feel like I am missing everything.

Sometimes I realize that I can't remember what we did last week and I wonder- how will I ever remember things in a month, in a year?

i don't ever want to look back and not remember. these days are precious. every single minute spent snuggling and squeezing and singing and dancing with these babies is so precious.

Some days I can't wait for 4 o'clock…. I pray for it to come because 4 o'clock means an extra set of hands to help with diapers, a warm body to watch the babies while I shower, an adult to laugh & talk with, a husband who helps to cook & clean & keep the house in order….. and a man who holds my hand.

And some days, like today, I just sit in my chair in the playroom wiping big tears and breathing in and out, trying to etch all the details in my mind….. while cars and rattles and baby giggles surround me.

One day it will be prom dresses and wedding dresses and grandbabies.

One day it will be first cars and college classes and girls showing up at the door to spend evenings with my boy.

I want to remember every bit of these days…. the juice cups and the dirty diapers, the bouncy chairs to trip over, the paintings on the refrigerator and the baby socks in the dryer, the milk spills in the high chair and the boxes of tiny girl dresses showing up on the porch, the cars and blocks and coloring books and slobbery rattles, the sticky hands and play-doh messes and mickey mouse music playing in the background.

I want to remember the softness of carter's skin when i nuzzle his neck and his giggles when i tickle his underarms. i want to remember the way that clover kicks her legs frantically when she sees me over her crib rails in the morning. i want to remember the tugs on my sweater and the "mama's" when carterbug wants to read a book. I want to remember the broken crayons, the messy paint brushes, the scattered toys, and the warm little bodies snuggled up against my chest.

I want to remember it all.

.... found a few minutes for a photo shoot ....

2011-03-03T02:46:00.001-08:00

Clover & I had a few minutes before Carter woke up the other day. She looked pretty and it had been awhile since I'd had my camera out so she & I decided it would be fun to take some of her 6 month pictures. In just the few minutes of time that we had- I am so thankful to have gotten several images that really showcase her blooming little personality. She is such a doll, that girl of mine... and a sweet little model too. I am such a proud mama.

I can't wait to get some more images of her..... hopefully this afternoon when big brother naps, she'll find her way in front of the camera again.

This is her typical look. Her "Mama- what are you doing now?" look:
and then there is this.... she loves to tuck that bottom lip under. it accentuates her cheeks. :) oh, for the love of drool... and big blue eyes: her sweet little smiles are the best.... ..... although I really like those big happy smiles too....

~ thanks for checking in on us! ~ J.

did i mention?.....

2011-02-21T14:23:00.001-08:00

.... that my baby boy is two now?

.... that I'm heart-broken (just a little bit) over it (well maybe more than a little bit)?

after his birthday party.... I had a moment to walk with him around the yard for awhile.... watching him stop to feel the grass & pick up leaves & play with his new party toys.

I had a moment to wipe tears. happy tears and sad tears all at once.

my baby boy is growing up so quickly. it's so overwhelming and it makes my heart hurt.

I watched him walk through the yard and couldn't help but notice that he is so full of beauty, full of wonder, full of curiosity and love and sweetness.....

I soaked up every bit of his beauty and every bit of God's blessing in him as I watched him explore....

.... I snapped a few pictures as the sun fell and I wished that those moments would never ever end.... oh why can't I slow time down?......

2 years ago today..... I wrote this:

2011-02-18T05:59:00.000-08:00

February 18, 2009
38 weeks and 6 days: Induction Day

My precious little boy,

You are bouncing and pushing around as I type.... and considering the thought that I won’t feel this again after tomorrow brings tears to my eyes. This pregnancy with you has been the most amazing journey in my life. You have been the source of so much incredible joy and I know that joy will only continue and grow in ways that I’m unable to comprehend right now.

Daddy and I will meet you tomorrow.

We’re both so excited and so nervous at the same time..... the anticipation is making us crazy. Our conversations and thoughts in these past several days have centered around the miracle of you and your arrival. The love that we both share for you already is immeasurable. We can’t wait to finally see your face, touch your skin, play with your toes, and welcome you into our wonderful families. There are so many people who are looking forward to your arrival and we’ll all be celebrating together in these next several months.

Throughout these past 39 weeks..... I’ve only dreamt about what you might possibly look like, whether or not you’ll look just like your daddy or just like me, whether or not your hair will be brown or blonde, if your cheeks will be chubby, if you’ll be big or small, short or tall..... I’ve daydreamt so many times of seeing you..... and tomorrow, we will.

Throughout these past 39 weeks, I’ve prayed so many hundreds of prayers for you and all that you have to experience. God is so good to us and He’s been so good to you. Daddy and I are both very confident that you have a wonderful life ahead of you and you’re being welcomed into this broken world by dozens of amazing people who love you so very much. We will all work together to help you grow into the man that God has intended you to be and there will never be a time when you find yourself alone.

As much as I look forward to seeing you tomorrow and watching you grow for the rest of my life here on Earth.... I also dread not carrying you within me anymore.

You’re safe now. You’re getting all that you need, I’m able to take care of you, and I’m able to protect you. When you’re here tomorrow.... you’re no longer just mine but you’re subject to thousands of other hands. I know that God didn’t intend for a woman to carry a baby for longer than 10 months.... and for this reason, I’m very happily introducing you to this world but this doesn’t reduce any of my fears. I imagine that I have known no real worries like the ones that will face me in these next several years.

You’re my baby, you always will be, and I will always do all that I can to protect you from harm or wrongdoing.God has done so much in these past several months to help me begin my transformation into motherhood and I am so excited to see what he will continue to bless me with over time. I have so much to look forward to, so many blessings to be thankful for, and so much in life to experience. I’m so glad that you’re joining me in this journey called life.... and that your daddy is with us both. He’s an incredible man and I couldn’t be more proud of how much he has grown since we met nine years ago. His love for you is incredible already.

Last night, just after I noticed he had fallen asleep on the couch, I woke him up to ask if he needed anything. He rolled over gently, moved around for just a moment, and all he said was... “Tomorrow”.

He must have been dreaming of you.

He’s going to be such an awesome father and you are so blessed to have him. You and I are both very blessed to have him.

Well, my sweet boy..... I could truly go on forever. It’s my style to pour my heart out and express how I’m feeling with words..... but there are so many things to do today in preparation for our hospital visit tonight.

Daddy and I can’t wait to meet you & we already love you more than I can ever articulate with words. I’ll be praying continuously for an easy and safe delivery.... and you’ll be in our arms so soon. I know that you’ll be the perfect, healthy, happy, chubby boy that I’ve been daydreaming about and all things will be perfect in the world when we see your beautiful little face for the first time.

I love you so much my bouncy boy..... and I’ll miss having you with me all the time. I’ll miss our special bond that we share now and I’ll miss the little poking and prodding games that we play. We have so much to look forward to though.... you, me, and Daddy. We are so blessed that God has given us the miracle of you.... and after this miraculous childbirth experience.... I imagine that Heaven will exist here on Earth for the three of us, even if only for a short time.

Thank you for these past 39 weeks. Thank you for being such a wonderful baby.

I can’t wait to meet you tomorrow Carterbug.

Love, Mommy

Little did I know that my life was never going to be the same. I knew that Carterbug would be here but I couldn't have imagined the overwhelming ways in which that love I had for him would grow. I couldn't have imagined the overwhelming joy that he would bring....

To say that we have been incredibly blessed with him is the largest understatement ever uttered from my lips.

He is every bit of awesome that I know. He is so nearly perfect that it takes my breath away. He is beautiful and beauty-full in every single sense.

I am so proud to be his mother. I am so grateful that God has trusted me with raising such an incredible little soul. I am absolutely thrilled to watch him grow and develop into the man that God has intended for him to be on this earth and I know he will do great things. His future, I am confident, is full of the most wonderful experiences.

This is genuinely bittersweet. What happened to my baby? Where is the chubby, drooling, foot-eating kiddo that I wrestled in my arms even just a year ago? TWO years already? How?

Zach and I were just watching him push his car around the living room last night and I noticed that Zach had tears in his eyes. Carter is blessed to have such a loving daddy and I am blessed to have a husband who values his little life just as much as I do. I know that I speak for Zach and I both when I admit that watching him grow is a bit heartwrenching.

Apparently after tomorrow.... the pediatrician says that I can start officially referring to him as a "toddler".... and when I helped him slip into his 5t pajamas last night, I certainly wasn't seeing a "baby" anymore.

My mind is flooded today with memories. Memories of an incredible childbirth experience, memories of those first days at home, those middle of the nights where Zach and I cried on the side of the bed because we didn't know how to keep Carter from screaming, memories of his first giggles and his slobbery chin when he was cutting his first teeth, memories of when Zach was dadadadadadadadada instead of just 'dada', memories of walks outside and pushing the stroller and watching him balance on those two feet when he was learning how to walk, memories of introducing him to his baby sister for the first time.... it is ALL so fresh in my mind.

We are constantly making memories, continuously writing Carter's life story.... and I look forward to new memories, new chapters. I realize that just as the past two years have been incredible.... so the next ones will be as well.

Tomorrow morning.... Carter will wake up as my two year old boy.... but just as in all other mornings, for the rest of his life, he will also wake up as my baby.

play date with Addie

2011-02-08T10:57:00.001-08:00

My poor sister-in-law Amber is on bed rest. :(

Our nephew is due in 3 weeks and her amniotic fluid is low....

I think we're all secretly praying (or not so secretly) that he is healthy as can be & can come a little early. Not just so he can come to Carterbug's birthday party but because we know that Amber wants to get off the couch & play with Addie again.... and we are all very excited to meet him!

Anyway.... while Mama spends her time on the couch.... Addie got to come out and play with Carter & Clover today.... which is so wonderful because we LOVE to have her over.

She & Carter & Clover really enjoy throwing all the toys everywhere in the playroom! By the way.... have a look at Carter's hair. ALL OVER THE PLACE MESSY MESS. That's the way we roll sometimes. It's crazy. It actually really resembles one of those messy mop cuts that a lot of women in their 60's are sporting. You'll see in the pictures later on... just wait.
....Addie gives Clover the biggest kisses..... we know that she's going to be a wonderful big sister when our new little nephew is here.
She had her first painting experience today during our play date.... Carter showed her how it's done... and then supervised her to be sure that she was doing it correctly. Addie saw some paint on Carter's arm and decided that she needed to paint hers. I think Grandma & I had to explain to Addie, more than a few times, that paint goes on paper, not arms. :) at least in the house. I think we will have a painting party in the spring. We'll all get in our underwear & paint all over the place outside.
Okay. Just to clarify: the kids will be in their underwear. NOT the adults.

She looked so cute in her smock. I'm so thankful that we ordered Clover one... a little early... because our other smocks are for boys.
a masterpiece by Carter & Addison: feast your eyes! Carter's work is on the left.... Addie's on the right. .... and here's a close-up of Addie's art just for her mommy & daddy to see:
Thank you for coming over today Addie! We love you and we are so excited for you to be a big sister! We look so forward to welcoming your little brother into our family.... there is no doubt that he'll be just as adorable & sweet as you are....

clover girl

2011-02-04T11:10:00.001-08:00

oh seriously. look at the beauty. and isn't it amazing how easy it is to see that behind those eyes is a soul that is just as beautiful as what you see on the outside?

this little one is going to do big things in life.... i just know it.

she is such a sweet little girl & we are SUPER blessed to have her around. no doubt about it.
wish you could hear the sweet little giggles that I heard when I snapped this one..... 6 months old already. :( where does the time go?

be still my heart.....

2011-01-31T17:20:00.000-08:00

a quiet Monday afternoon. my two beautiful babies. playing together. and separately.

they are so precious.

i am so smitten.

we are all so blessed.

love this face

2011-01-24T21:04:00.000-08:00

love this little girl. love those big gorgeous blue eyes. love those big round pink cheeks. love that little mouth & how she tucks her bottom lip so much. love that wispy dark blonde hair. love her smile, her quiet laugh, her wobbles when she tries to sit, her cries in the middle of the night when she wants to nurse, her sweet sweet admiration for her big brother.

she is awesome. she is miraculous. she is so unbelievably sweet.

..... and she is only a few sleeps away from being six months old.

almost half of a year.

how is that possible?

hello blog.

2011-01-10T13:01:00.000-08:00

enjoying a clean house today.... compliments of my amazing husband. he is incredible, to say the least.

asked him if he would help me clean the floors yesterday.... and that turned into so much more.

how did I ever get to be so lucky? God is good to me.

.... this picture was taken months ago.... not too many months ago.... but months ago, nonetheless. I realized that I hadn't ever shared it here & thought it was definitely worth sharing. he is precious. too precious for words. I am not nearly eloquent enough to express my adoration for these babies and for my loving God that created them.

- having one of those many days where I just want to snap pictures, snuggle with the babies, and pray often to be sure that God knows just how much I love Him and how grateful I really am.

my pride & joy

2011-01-05T16:55:00.000-08:00

clover girl . yesterday . she is SO much fun nowadays & so cute too: these were taken on Saturday: her little facial expressions are just awesome. She is SO expressive.
And then there's Carterbug.... sweet beautiful Carterbug boy. Enjoying a popsickle:
And his beautiful painting he painted! He is so talented huh?
here he is.... in the process of making his masterpiece:
I think we can attribute some of the talent to the turtle slippers. his messy paintbrushes....

Carterbug & I made a cow puppet yesterday and we all contributed to a family painting tonight. I'll try to post images of those treasures tomorrow.....

name that baby....

2011-01-03T10:45:00.000-08:00

name that baby: Carter or Clover??

chose ones with eyes closed or turned away because the eyes give it away.... but do you know who these babies are? The two of them look so different to me a lot of times.... but then there are photos like these & every once in awhile when I honestly wonder if I could tell them apart.

oh.... and..... they have both worn all of these outfits. :)

new year, new pictures, high hopes....

2011-01-01T11:21:00.001-08:00

Our sweet beautiful babies.... taken just this past week. They are both so wonderful & we are excited to be starting this brand new year with them in our home, at our sides, in our arms. God has blessed us beyond measure with these two. Carter: 22 months.

Clover: 4 months.

Carter had his first 2 trips to the ER this weekend. Not really the way we wanted to end 2010 but thankfully, he is okay.

Friday night- we took him to the ER for severe abdominal pain. He was screaming & clutching at me for nearly an hour before I drove him in. He's had horrible diarrhea for several days & we were both concerned about appendicitis. Turns out- they did an abdominal series & some investigating/tests.... only to conclude that he has a great deal of swelling & gas in his intestines. Solution: mylicon & motrin. So far- all stool testing has come back negative.

Saturday was a different story... not as simple, unfortunately. Carter ate a cashew and was rushed to the ER when his lips started to swell. On the way there- he also threw up & welts started to form all over his body. When he got to the hospital- his oxygen status had already started to decline. After he received several shots & medications..... his poor little body adjusted itself and within 3-4 hours, he appeared to be mostly normal again. The greatest reaction took place with his skin. By the time I arrived at the ER (I had to leave work).... his skin was bright red ALL OVER. His face was swollen, he had welts & raised areas all over his back and arms, and he was pretty well out of it thanks to the big doses of benadryl.

After a few hours of observation in the ER- we were sent home with what seems like a small pharmacy of medications & strict instructions to not feed him anything with nuts or peanut oil in it's ingredients. It turns out that raising a small boy who is allergic to nuts is interesting & we have already thrown out several things in the pantry as not to accidentally give him anything that could potentially kill him.

We now have to carry an epinephrine pen with us everywhere we go and need to be extremely cautious & close to an ER until we can get him into see an allergist.

What a way to end the year!

But here's to 2011..... and we have already determined that it will be the best year of our lives thus far. We have so much to be thankful for! Thank you for following along on the blog this past year with us.... and for appreciating our little journey. This year- I have several resolutions.... one which consists of putting together an album that I've already started called "Photobooth Fridays".

Our computer has an application on it called Photo Booth that takes pictures of us with the camera built into the computer monitor. Every Friday- we're going to take some pictures with Photo Booth & compile those images, throughout the year, into an album. The pictures that we take with the computer camera are not incredible by any means- but they're fun to take & the babies love to see themselves on the computer screen. Here is a picture we took with Photo Booth on Friday: Carter teaching Clove her body parts.

I'm so excited to see this little album come together throughout the year. :)

Lots to look forward to in 2011. We hope that whoever reads this has high hopes for the new year as well.....

Happy New Year! Love~ J.

Is it really 2011?

2010-12-28T11:20:00.000-08:00

I know... not yet it isn't. But almost.... and that is so hard for me to swallow.

I think it's because I've been working so feverishly on Carter's book & 2009 is written all over the place. 2011 means that my boy will be two soon. ugg. THAT IS DIFFICULT.

I will pretend not to think of it and just go on about my post here.

Carter's book is coming together so nicely. I can't wait to share it when it's completed. Right now... I'm on page 30... so moving right along...

And I'm having so much fun looking through all of those older images, even editing a few here & there which is really nice. Like this one for instance:

I had originally edited this in black & white.... I posted it here on this blog. It was taken when little man was just 5 days old. LOVE it. LOVE so many of those early images. I'm having a ball going through all of them. I'm so thankful that I took over 16,000 images in that first year. I have not one single regret about that. There are some awful ones... blurry, eyes closed kinds.... but then there are treasures too. My favorite are the ordinary, everyday pictures that I love.... photos that tell a story of little tidbits that I've already forgotten like this one:

how tiny he is.... and that little biliblanket.... and the basket of diaper changing materials.... and the blue paci he never took.... and the fireplace that I left on ALWAYS in those early weeks because it was soothing for me and it made the apartment look pretty. oh... and that wall color. It's gorgeous. Same color that's in Clover's bedroom now & I LOVE it. I'm seriously considering using it in some other rooms in the house.

So the book.... incase you are curious.... is going to be hardback. My guess is that it will have between 250 & 300 pages. It's a pretty detailed account of Carter's first year.... tons of pictures, writings, journals, blog entries, letters, doctor's appointment info, etc. Here are a few of the pages I have to share:

It's a work in progress.... I'm adding to it a little each day.... and hoping to be done with it sometime in February. I'd love to have it done in time for his second birthday but I'm not rushing through it. After it's completed- I'm going to start putting one together for Clover.

Christmas was wonderful. The babies were absolutely spoiled rotten but it was wonderful. Carter is really enjoying his new easel, his new devotional, his table & chairs, and his block table. He's also really into Clover's shape sorter ball & stackable cups. Zach & I bought him a little spout for the bathtub that he is totally infatuated with. He requests several baths a day so that he can play with it.

Clover really likes her Sophie giraffe teether. She has been chomping on it every chance she gets. Aunt Amber & Uncle Kevin also got her a water mat that she seems pretty intrigued with so she's been spending a lot of time with that too.

I have a lot of new pictures.... I'm uploading them to the computer as I type here so they will be ready to share soon.

I've been working really hard this week to get organized in time for the new year. I've cleaned out 2 closets and this afternoon, I plan to go through our master bedroom closet/clothes. We have so much de-cluttering to do around here. I'm not looking forward to doing it but I'm looking forward to having it done.

Clover is sitting here in the high chair next to me and she looks cute as can be so I had better snap a few pictures of her before her mood changes. ;)

I'll update again soon with some great pictures of the babies. ~ J.

big project underway... sorry for the lack of blogging!

2010-12-17T12:46:00.000-08:00

please forgive me.

BUT:

I am currently undertaking the biggest project of my life.

really.

I'm sorting through, organizing, and compiling all of the images from Carter's first year. I have this crazy vision of them all being bound into a book.... and then once that giant task is completed- I will start with Clover's. (which I am hoping with be an easier process the second time around)

I am still journaling. just not on the blog. I'm sorry.

.... and with Christmas coming- things are crazy.

not to mention: one of my biggest nightmares came to life last week: MY CAMERA IS DYING.

It's acting up in a big way & I have got to get it to the shop to get fixed. Except that there are 5 inches of snow in my driveway. I cannot imagine bundling up with 2 babies and venturing out into this snowy wet mess to drive an hour to the camera shop. Hopefully Monday- I'll feel up to it because it has to be done. And I know whoever is reading this is looking for a new picture of my beautiful babies. :)

Have a great weekend everyone.... I have to get back to my photo sorting while the babes are napping. Thanks for checking in! ~ J.

December Daily: day three . TIME

2010-12-03T12:33:00.000-08:00

Today's prompt was about greeting cards. And I will do my part to participate by talking about greeting cards for just a minute and then I want to talk about something that is weighing much heavier on my mind than greeting cards today.

When I think of greeting cards right now.... I think of Christmas cards and here's the deal with Christmas cards this year. Putting together Christmas cards is TIME CONSUMING. Even if you just buy the store bought kind.... you still have to get everyone's address, make sure they are all right, that no one moved during the year, make sure not to forget anyone, address all the envelopes, sign all the cards, if you're going to include a picture- you have to have those printed, and then get them all sealed, stamped, & in the mailbox. That takes a lot of time. And I REALLY appreciate getting Christmas cards in the mail because in the back of my mind- I'm thinking: How nice of that person to take the time to do all of this! Seriously.... if you send out Christmas cards- I adore you. I would LOVE to send some out & we may still do that this year but.... I have to really sit down and schedule it or we will never find the time to get it done.

Time is something that we have VERY little of here.... which is exactly what I wanted to really talk about today, not Christmas cards.

TIME.

This is such an important topic for me because I really believe that our country is in a horrible mess because families are not as close as they used to be. Part of the reason why families are not as intimate is because of our huge lack of time. Our world is busy. There are too many distractions.

Time is SO precious. It's hard to come by when you have 2 little ones. There is not enough of it in the day. I run out of it constantly. And I don't spend enough of it doing the things that I really, truly LOVE.

I was talking to a nurse today at work about time and how little of it we have. Actually, truth be told, the conversation didn't start out about time at all. It started out about babies & toddlers & God.... and it ended up being a big conversation about something I've been thinking a lot about lately.... time WASTING.

I am forever griping that I don't have enough time so lately, I've started to evaluate where I am spending my time & how I can make more of it. Obviously- there are a lot of distractions in life and so many time wasters but I will list a few of my big ones just for fun.

The internet is a BIG time waster for me. I will get online sometimes to update the blog or check my e-mail and I end up looking at all sorts of blogs & websites that are really interesting & even inspiring.... but I decided to start setting a limit for myself. When I sit down to get onto the computer, I evaluate what I have to do and I give myself so many minutes to do it. When the clock hits that number.... I get off the computer. I just started this and so far.... so good.

TOYS. Picking up toys is a BIG time waster for me. I think I might have already talked about this before so I apologize for repeating myself if I have but if it's mid-day and there's a toy in the floor.... i DO NOT pick it up. It's a total waste of time picking up toys in the middle of the day. They will end up right back where they came from. Zach & I wait until Carter goes to bed and then pick all of the toys up, that we haven't already instructed him to pick up because we are working with him on cleaning up his messes right now. (which he isn't entirely fond of)

I'm doing okay so far.... particularly since this is something that I am just now starting to work on.... and I really am finding that I have more time. But the problem so far is that: the more time I have, the more demands I am putting on myself.

There are so many distractions in life..... things to keep us from focusing on what is important. Zach and I just had a conversation about this on the phone. We're considering canceling our cable service. This would not only save us time but it would also save us a lot of money and most importantly, it would save us from having to see a lot of smut that our minds don't need anyway. There are so many inappropriate things on television, things that we definitely don't want or need to see and things that we absolutely don't want the babies seeing. Even some of the commercials are terribly inappropriate. Zach grew up in a home without cable television and he survived. He's pretty normal for the most part. :)

If you free up more of your time and limit it to essential activities and communications.... you're freeing up hours for doing amazing things like spending more one-on-one time with your children, reading a good book, creating things, pursuing hobbies that you love.

What I think I will do is start from scratch. I've made it a goal to sit down sometime over the next few days and create a list of the things that I value the most. I'm going to make a list of what I want to spend my time on based on priority and then go from there. I'll start with an empty list, add to it only the things that I need and love, and let the rest go to the wayside.

I know that I've done something crucial by admitting that I do not have time for everything. There's too much out there to read, too many hobbies to take on, too many favors to grant, too many people to connect with, and too many tasks to actually complete.

Now I have to do something else very crucial and that is to find peace with that. Finding peace with the fact that I cannot have time for everything is my next step and I think I am okay with it for now. I'm definitely okay with admitting that I don't have time for everything and I think over time, after making it a practice to clean my slate a little bit, I'll find that there is a much simpler way of living. I imagine that the simple life will be my preference.

What's essential & what's not? Cut out what's not.

....and the same goes for people..... which is something that I have spent the past couple of years working on. If someone isn't having a positive influence on your life.... it's silly to allow them to continue to be a part of it. We should all want to be better people.... and anyone hindering you from that shouldn't be aloud to waste anymore of your precious time.

this is just my opinion by the way, which is precisely why I LOVE living in America. I can share my opinion and if you don't like it- you don't have to listen to (or read about) it.

SO. this is all new to me. this whole 'don't waste anymore time' thing. and I'm really excited about it. I'm doing a lot of praying about it too. Praying that I am still passionate about it weeks & even years from now.... and praying that I'm able to really start enjoying more time on truly important things.

I think it's so crucial.... when attempting to make a change in my life, to set short term goals. So I'm going to have a talk with Zach tonight and try to come up with some short term goals. Today's short term goal was simple: Do not turn on the tv. And let me tell you what:

It's not easy. Not because I enjoy tv.... because I really don't. But because Carter enjoys watching Mickey Mouse & Little Einsteins on Disney.

I hate not letting him watch those shows, particularly while I tend to Clover. It's hard to entertain them both at once. If Clover is upset and needs some one-on-one attention for 20 minutes or so for comforting or nursing: I will usually allow Carter to watch tv for that 20 minutes and tend to her.

Now: I have got to try and undo this habit, which is not only difficult for me but Carter has pointed at the tv several times today and I've had to remind him that we're not going to watch any tv.... we're going to play.

note to self: 21 month olds do not understand that.

He's actually doing really well though, honestly. He hasn't pointed at the tv in the past couple of hours and we've done SO much together. We've colored, played with Play-doh, played with his dinosaurs. The only problem I am seeing with this whole thing is that I have the desire to go spend more money on things to entertain him with because not allowing him close to 2 hours of time with Mickey a day is going to mean that we have to come up with 2 more hours of activities. Goodness- what did they do in the 1800's when there was no Fisher Price & Wii?

Well- I'll tell you what they did. Children spent more time with their parents instead of being entertained by the television and video games. And when they were not spending time with their families, they were riding their bikes, dancing outside, and playing sports. These were the days before morbidly obese children and soaring juvenile detention rates.

I bought a book called Toddler Play which is really pretty amazing & it's filled with ideas of how to occupy your toddler's time. We're using a lot of ideas in that book and really enjoying them. I would recommend it to anyone.

If anyone else has suggestions or ideas for how to occupy our time- I'm totally open to suggestions. We are doing a lot of art stuff..... and I'm SUPER excited about Christmas coming because rumor has it that Carter is getting some more art supplies that we can play & create with. He's also getting some new biblical based books & some education toys that I'm really excited about sharing with him.

I'm also looking for some educational videos so if you have any or have heard any recommended- please let me know what they are. We have several Baby Einstein videos and Carter loves the ones that we have.... but we have seen them all several times. We could definitely benefit from a larger selection, especially since we will only have 4 channels to choose from in the very near future.

okay.... enough for today. It's time for dinner & family time. :)

I can't promise that I'll be back for day 4 because I work tomorrow.... so here's a sweet photo to look at in the meantime:

the princess. she is SO serious. LOVE her sweet little serious looks though. she is awesome to say the least.

December Daily: day two

2010-12-02T14:21:00.000-08:00

When I decided that my new year's resolution would be to journal more.... I obviously made the decision that starting ahead of time, in December, would be valuable because in the month's time- I could gather some ideas and inspiration for journaling and make it more of a habit in the process.

SO: I decided to read a book that was recommended by a great lady that I adore in the scrapbooking world, Ali Edwards. Ali is well-known for her love of photos+writing+storytelling about everyday life. She inspires me every time I visit her website.

Anyway.... she recommended a book by an author that I have read before and since I LOVE him so much- I downloaded his book on my Kindle and started reading it yesterday. I figured out that it was well worth ten bucks before I even made my way out of the author's note at the beginning of the book. (which I never take the time to read by the way but since I love this guy, I figured it would be worth it and it definitely was)

by the way: his name is Donald Miller & the book is: A Million Miles in a Thousand Years

by the way: don't "click to look inside" because you can't. And Amazon- I'm sorry I stole your image of the cover. Hopefully Donald won't mind since I am promoting his book and probably making him some extra holiday cash for his Christmas present shopping this year.

I haven't gotten far into the book yet but read this bit from his author's note:

"The truth is, if what we choose to do with our lives won't make a story meaningful, it won't make a life meaningful either."

amazing. If you feel like a story about your life is boring or would be boring.... change your life so that a different story can be told. If you want your life to be a story of giving, loving, embracing everyday, and making a difference.... make it that way....

and then I got onto his blog earlier so that I could post a link to it and found this, also written by him:

The great stumbling block of the creative mind is the awareness of self from the perspective of others. Self awareness isn’t the enemy, because we are in fact masterworks of God, but rather the overemphasis regarding what others think of us. When we think too much about the opinions of others, we are letting them edit a book God has written.

anyway.... I'm no Donald Miller or motivational speaker but what an incredible concept.

I am SO excited about reading this book. When do you have time to read?!, you ask? Because that is precisely the question I got from my husband today..... I read at night before I go to sleep because it is the ONLY time I have to read and if Clover is still awake, because she still has zero schedule, then I'll read while I nurse her until she drifts off to sleep.

I also figured out that a lot of people who journal regularly use 'prompts', which I have never used.... which is probably precisely why sometimes my journaling is just nonsense & rambles. I found this pretty neat lady in England who has an online class every December called "Journaling Christmas". You can find it here if you're interested: http://www.shimelle.com/classes/841/an-online-scrapbooking-class-for-the-holidays-journal-your-christmas/

I'll be honest. I have no rave reviews to post yet by I'm sticking with it and I'm sure by the end of the month, I'll have fallen in love. Right now, I'm still busy trying to figure out all of the ins and outs of her site. It's very organized, almost too organized for my OCD self, and there are these forum things that I just can't seem to figure out. Of course- I am really short on time so that doesn't help.

okay... pause.... Carter has just woken from his cat nap and is dragging a very full gallon of milk my way with all of his might. I think he is trying to tell me that he is thirsty?

alright. he's happy. now please say a prayer for my husband. Because if I'm not mistaken- he just installed a $160 starter on my car and I can hear the car grumbling in the driveway but NOT starting. He did mention earlier that if the car doesn't start- he will come in, take a shower, and go straight to bed.

I don't blame him. I hate car problems.

So in this whole prompt & journaling your Christmas thing..... today's prompt was to write about the weather. I guess I am suffering from creative block because I have nothing to say that is entertaining or interesting about the weather that anyone would actually want to read. This is the picture that I found when I looked up today's weather on weatherchannel.com:

that's all I have people. It's cloudy. It's cold. It's occasionally windy. It snowed yesterday but not even enough to cover the ground so there are no leftovers.

I have already failed the class.

.... so journaling with prompts may not be my thing, apparently.

I will share some pictures here quickly before I have to go comfort my husband because that car is not starting and if I listened really closely.... I could probably hear curse words coming from the drive.

Here are some recent pictures of Carter from Gymboree.... and since the past two days have been pictures of him- tomorrow I'll make it a point to talk a little more about her highness.

thanks for checking in. say a prayer for the car (and for Zach). ~ J.

December Daily: day one

2010-12-01T16:21:00.000-08:00

I got this really sweet little e-mail from someone the other day regarding my blog that reminded me that there are some really nice ladies out there who follow along and enjoy reading what I have to write (or type rather).

Which is awesome, by the way, and I am SO flattered that people care how I feel, what I think, and spend time in their lives reading about it all.

Awesome.

When I starting this blogging thing- I really started it for family, particularly those who are out of town and didn't see the babies very often. And then as I really started adding more and more entries- I found this amazing little company who can put your blog into a book for you..... so I figured out quickly that this is also a really nice thing to do for the babies. Sort of a journal but not as intimate & they'll be able to look back at all of the entries and see what was happening in our lives. Which is really pretty neat if you ask me because my mom did not have a blog when I was a baby. darn it.

(forgive me for the lack of fabulous words today.... I'm not feeling on top of the world by any means.... actually, I feel pretty cruddy and if I wasn't POSITIVE that I am NOT pregnant- I would think that I was pregnant. body aches, headache, lack of appetite.... just plain gross and all I really want to do is crawl into a bubble bath and then sit on the couch and watch a movie.... which is precisely what I think I will do when I'm done here.)

Over the past year or two- I've gotten busy. REALLY busy. New house, 2 babies, husband, making time for God, bible studies, cleaning, working, scrapbooking, sewing, reading when I can, the everyday stuff.... my friend Gretchen is always telling me: "Jay- you have a lot on your plate" and I am starting to believe her and stop beating myself up for what I am not getting done.

One thing I want to do plenty of though.... and one of my new years resolutions is to JOURNAL more.

And since New Years always comes and goes and by January 15th I've forgotten what my resolution even was.... I decided that December is a good time to get started on whatever it really is that I want to start doing so that by January 1st- it's a habit.

good idea huh?

of course- then what I really have is some sort of end of the year resolution so to speak but whatever.

So in an attempt to journal more in 2011.... December Daily is my head start effort. I'm going to try to post a blog everyday this month give or take a couple of days because I'm going to be realistic here. Somedays, particularly Saturday & Sunday- it's just not necessarily possible to get to a computer and type anything. And then there are days like today when I have trouble thinking because I feel so cruddy and everything I type is sooooo boring.

like now. no one is probably reading this because it's terrible.

so- here's to December Daily. My very first post. my very boring post.

and a picture too! a really sweet picture that I adore.

my boy.... he is precious. he did this all on his own. thank GOODNESS I was able to get back quickly enough with the camera to capture it.

found this scene in Clove's room several days ago..... Mickey in the front, blankie in the back....

as promised

2010-11-29T21:16:00.001-08:00

.... and terribly behind because little princess is actually FOUR months old today. :(
.... and just for the record: I made dinner tonight.

I did 4-5 loads of laundry, cleaned out the microwave, emptied the dishwasher, did 2-3 days worth of dishes BY HAND (old fashioned, I know), put together new baby toys, took a shower, put makeup on, played games, changed diapers, swept the kitchen floor (but didn't mop), AND made dinner too.

.... and Zach said it was "really good". NOW- that is amazing. I deserve a reward. I think a few things are calling my name in internet shopping carts.

me & my OCD (or not)

2010-11-28T14:43:00.000-08:00

so I've joked about having OCD for years. In fact- I was just telling a patient last week that her room was driving me absolutely nutso because she had random junk sprawled out all over the place and I could hardly stand that the kleenex box top was only half ripped off. She said "OH- you have that thing that my sister has and you have to have everything clean all the time and check for spider webs in corners?"....

.... and then, of course, I said: "YES!!! and I totally forgot to take my meds this morning so let me throw half of your crap away, clean up this room, & get you a new kleenex box."

In all of my free time today... I decided that I would check into things and download an OCD checklist.

Well:

It turns out that I apparently don't have OCD because I definitely don't have bottles of hand sanitizer falling out of my car when I open the doors and I don't have troublesome blasphemous thoughts or fears of being homosexual or the belief that certain numbers are unlucky or the need to touch objects repeatedly......

and so right about now- you are asking "Where are the pictures of the kids?!"

but all I can think about is the fact that my laundry room looks like Auntie Em's house after the tornado and there is this sticky goop just under the edge of the bar on the floor in the kitchen that looks like it could possibly be play-doh but is probably more likely to be a piece of strawberry from C's snack the other day. I'm also really irritated about the disorganization in Clover's room because I am busy sorting & organizing all of her clothes into sizes and what's driving me even more crazy are the boxes upstairs that have no labels on them so I have no clue whether there are college text books or Christmas decor inside.

The disorganization is driving me nuts and the cold hard truth is this: I am a working mother who loves to spend time with her children. I have a toddler who loves to play, a three month old who loves to be held and cuddled, a nursing job, a part-time photography job, a husband to try & please, a house to clean and take care of, art & play classes to get my son to every week, showers to take, family to visit, and when exactly is there time for sorting through boxes in the attic or putting on makeup?

never.

WHY did no one ever tell me that if I wanted to have a clean house- I would have to have a babysitter or a maid?

I feel like this is perhaps the largest misconception of motherhood.

You are 7 months pregnant dreaming of beautiful newborn babies in their sweet little white velvet outfits, tucked away peacefully in their gorgeous little crib with soft music playing from the iPOD on the dresser, and where are you? Well- you are in the kitchen with a fresh loaf of bread in the oven & a gourmet dinner on the stove that you just discovered in your latest Women's Day magazine and you are dressed in the cute little outfit you picked up from Macy's last week on sale, and you're admiring your new pedicure while the homemade noodles dry on the cutting board and daydreaming about the cute little nightgown you will surprise your husband with later while the two of you enjoy a quiet evening after the baby is tucked into bed.

Seriously.

and THEN real life happens. you have the baby. a couple of weeks pass. or months. whatever.

You're not in the kitchen. You're in the laundry room seperating the laundry and you're trying to determine whether or not to shove 15 towels in the washer because you just NEED THEM DONE. You're on your cell phone ordering pizza for dinner and that precious newborn baby is butt naked because they've just pooped all over the cute outfit you basically wasted your time putting them in 45 minutes ago. You smell of baby puke because the baby spit up on your t-shirt from high school that you really should have thrown out 3 years ago and oh crap- you don't have any pants on because the flannel snowflake pants you had on 2 hours ago got tossed into the hamper when you realized that you wore those yesterday (and maybe the day before? ). You have your toes curled under so that you don't have to look at your half-painted nails that haven't been touched since just before the baby was born and truth be told- you only had that pedicure because you started to panic about having your feet right in someone's face. As if they are going to be looking at your feet when your woman parts are staring right at them with 8 pounds of screaming bloody baby emerging from the innards. You daydream of showers and 7 straight hours of sleep and clean ovens.... and your iPOD is playing some goofy song from the 90's that your husband's friend put on there 5 years ago and you haven't had time to put new songs on it or to just change the album that's playing. Your hair is looking pretty crazy, your makeup is leftover from yesterday, and the last time you read a Woman's Day magazine was at that 8 month pre-natal appointment when you realized you had read the Parent's magazine they had on display at least 13 times because you could predict exactly where the cute little outfit on pg 7 was from and you knew the kid on pg 27 was adopted.

now- that's more like it.

and I KNOW THIS. obviously. This is my life in a nutshell.

so why do I get home sometimes on Sunday nights after 2 full days at work and look around wondering why on earth the house didn't just clean itself while I was gone? Where the heck is the maid!?

wish me luck. tomorrow is Monday. and the house is a mess. and I have a feeling that I will get home tonight and my jaw will drop when I see that the goop is still there and the laundry is still piled.

BUT. I don't have OCD so that's good news. and my beautiful babies are happy & healthy.

I will tuck them in after story time tonight & get to work....

and I might even post a picture of them tomorrow in between loads of laundry, wiping tears, finding shoes, matching socks, giving hugs, going through last week's mail, and ordering the pizza for dinner.

Carter . Month 20

2010-11-11T13:05:00.000-08:00

Carter-

Just look at you. FULL of life. FULL of love. FULL of joy and happiness. And may that never ever change. You are absolutely incredible and you take happiness with you on a string wherever you go. I totally admire your little outlook on life. Everything is good and every once in awhile you get mad, you throw something.... and it's all good again. That is your motto.

We have started Gymboree classes this month and you are the coolest kid there. I hope none of the other moms become my friend, read my blog, and fight me at class but it's the truth. You are so sweet & wonderful in your art class. Actually- after our class this previous week- the teacher talked about how wonderful you were and gave you an extra stamp of Gymbo the clown on your belly. Your daddy and I despise clowns- thankfully, this is not a gene that you inherited because they are all about the clown at that place.

You are really enjoying your art class. We've been a couple of times and you are finally starting to get the hang of things. We work on an art project for a few minutes, have snack time, play in the sand table, have story time, play some music & clap our hands, work on another art project, play a game, and sing a good-bye song. On the way out- we get stamps on our hands. It's so much fun and I'm really enjoying the one-on-one time with you every week while nana & papa care for Clover for us. I think you are really enjoying the extra time with mama too because you have been quite clingy in these past couple of weeks... and so happy too.

You LOVE your sister.... that hasn't changed. You are super protective of her and I've noticed that it is enhanced by a million when we are out & about. When the two of you are together outside of the house- you will not leave her side. You're constantly going to check on her & you watch very closely when other people are paying attention to her. The other evening- we went to Gymboree for play gym & Clover slept in her car seat while you played. Every time other little kids would venture over to look at her- you would stop what you were doing, go give her a hug & a kiss, and then go back to playing. It's just as if you were letting everyone know that she was YOUR sister and you were letting her know that you were still there. SO sweet you are. It just blows me away.

Some new things this month: you are babbling A LOT. You make no sense for the most part but you are really making more of an effort to communicate. Tonight while you were taking your bath- I asked if you were ready to get out and put your pajamas on and you said: "No No No" as clearly as can be. You shake your head no now instead of waving your arm back & forth. You are saying "mama" quite a bit lately and I think it's become your favorite word because every time you say it I ask "what?". So you'll say "mama", I'll say "what", and then you'll say "mama" again. If we keep going back & forth- you start laughing. It's almost like a little knock-knock joke that never ends.

You are also showing more interest in the potty. You're grabbing your diaper when you have to pee and when I ask if you want to go to the potty- you'll strip your diaper off, run to the bathroom, and sit on your potty chair. You have yet to actually go potty in the chair but at least you are showing that you understand what it's for.

You are laughing at tv shows. This is brand new- just within the past 2 weeks. Daddy & I were watching old Mickey Mouse episodes with you one night and you were cracking up.... as if you knew exactly what was going on. You are laughing very appropriately though so I'm pretty amazed as you can imagine. Seems hysterical that a 20 month old has a sense of humor.

Christmas is coming up and you have no idea. You're not quite old enough to understand it all yet. I've been talking to you about it off & on lately but we haven't put up any decorations so it's still probably not clicking with you. We bought some ornaments yesterday for you & Clover (mama buys you a special one every year) and I told you that the ornaments were special for the Christmas tree. You just looked at me like I was crazy & then grunted at the box.

You are a wonderful boy in public. I took you to a store yesterday afternoon to pick up a few things for the playroom & you were so well behaved. You followed me around with your blanket on your shoulder. You never touched anything that you were not supposed to and you followed close behind. It was very surprising actually and the cashier commented before we left that you were the best behaved toddler she had ever seen in the store. I took that as quite the compliment & rewarded you with a small squishy ball toy that you have toted & squeezed around all day today. You have hundreds of dollars worth of toys & you're obsessed with a 89 cent ball from Pier One. Go figure. Why do we spend so much on toys?

Speaking of which- with Christmas coming we are doing a lot of shopping lately for new things and I've found so many adorable little things to get you that I'm excited about. We're decorating the playroom, Daddy & Grandpa Wolma are making you a toy bin (I don't think grandpa is aware of it yet), we're decorating your bathroom, and mama has bought you a lot of books and educational toys. I can't wait to play with all the new things in the new playroom & see how you like them. I'll be sure to tell you more about the things you are getting for Christmas in your Christmas letter this year.

Today is Papa's birthday.... his 67th birthday.... and we spent the evening with He & Nana. We has some spaghetti & meatballs at their house and watched a few episodes of Mickey Mouse all the while throwing the coasters in the floor and calling random people on the phone. It wouldn't be a normal evening at their house if you were not throwing coasters & making phone calls. After you hit mama in the head with the pie roller- we decided it was probably time for bed and came home to read the Grinch Who Stole Christmas. You were not too terribly interested in the book.... probably because there is more writing than you are used to on the pages....but you paid more attention to it than I thought you would so I finished it before changing your diaper and tucking you in. You are the sweetest at bedtime. You are still taking a bottle of milk at bedtime which is perfectly fine according to your pediatrician. You take your bottle, snuggle up next to Mr. Giraffe, hold on tight to your blankie.... and wave at mama as I leave the room and say goodnight. You are precious at all times of the day but bedtime is pretty special. I couldn't ask for you to handle it any better. You never fight having to go to sleep. You lay down right away & start to wave.

I'm looking forward to getting some snow this winter season so that we can sled in the backyard. We have a small hill back there- and it'll be perfect for your size. I cant wait to go out in the middle of the night at the first snow and buy a little sled for you. We have so much to look forward to in the coming months. Next week marks your second Thanksgiving, and then we'll have Christmas, winter-time, your second birthday.... so many milestones.

I love you sweet boy. You are the sunshine of our lives. :) Keep being sweet little you & you will never go wrong.

Love~ mama

Dear Clover . Month 3

2010-11-09T09:52:00.000-08:00

Miss Clover.

well.... where shall I begin? I could start out by telling you how adorable you are. Your chubby little cheeks & big blue eyes are the perfect combination for a stunning little 3 month old girl. Strangers comment on how beautiful you are when we are out and all of my patients see your photo hanging on my badge & boast about how precious and sweet you are.

and you are certainly that.... precious and sweet. when mama is around anyway. otherwise.... you leave a lot to be desired.

I'm sure that by the time you are old enough to read & understand mama's letters- we have already shared with you a dozen or so times that you refused a bottle. Or maybe not.... I suppose that years from now we'll have forgotten all about the mess we're in with you not wanting to eat from anyone from mommy. You are a very sweet little girl who loves her mama and that isn't anything to be disputed, particularly since mama is the only one who feeds you. When mama is not around.... Clover is not happy.... plain and simple.

We have tried everything.... all sorts of different bottles & nipples, syringes & spoons.... you are a very particular girl and I can't help but wonder if this trait will follow you. Will you always be very sure about what it is you prefer? I am much like that myself so it would not surprise me.

As I type this- you are well into hour three of your nap. Amazing. Particularly since you didn't take naps a few weeks ago. You cried a lot. That's all I remember. It was rough.... and then there was prevacid. Once we got you on some medicine things turned around a little for us all- and then once we started giving you your dose in the mornings.... things changed a lot.

You are MUCH better. MUCH happier. MUCH more pleasant to be around. And we really LOVE you now. Of course we have loved you to pieces since before you were born and even in your monster days we loved you.... but now we really love you AND love to be around you.

Bits of your little personality are starting to come through and mama is so excited to see more. You are obviously particular, you are more serious than not, and you are extremely curious. You will stare intently at people or things for several minutes at a time, raising your eyebrows at them periodically. It's hilarious. You are going to be totally different from your brother, I have a feeling. I imagine that you will always look at him just like you do now.... and perhaps one day you'll even go as far as to say: "Carter- what on earth are you doing?".... because this is exactly how you seem to feel about him now. He dances & prances around the room, runs all over the place, screams & laughs like crazy, and he gets right up in your face constantly.... and you just stare at him like he's lost his 20 month old mind.

You rolled over for the first time last Tuesday. November 2nd, 2010. You were 3 months and 4 days old and it was election day. A BIG election day.... the one where that crazy Nancy lady had to step down from her pedestal and thank goodness she did because your daddy & I are tired of watching her clap like a crazy person every time the president takes a breath.

We won't get into politics now.... you're a bit young for that.

I can hear your brother in his room.... running through all of his words. He's just recently woke up from his nap & this is very typical Carter-after the nap-behavior. He talks to himself. "ma-ma, ba-ba, da-da, na-na, pa-pa, ma-ma".... and then he makes cat sounds. I tell you what Clove.... I bet you 10 dollars that you talk in full sentences before he does. The kid doesn't want to talk. He is so funny. No complaints at all though because Daddy & I love his babbling. LOVE it. He cracks us up.

You are getting prettier and prettier every single day. Your little cheeks are so chubby, your little eyes are so blue, your little thighs are so roly poly. You are just adorable. And your huge open mouthed smiles are to die for. You could not be any sweeter.

We are so excited to have you in our lives.... we truly are. It's incredible having a little girl around. You're getting a doll house for Christmas! And I can tell you that because you can't read! You'll never get this letter sorted out before then so I might as well let you know that you're getting one.... and it's beautiful. And you're also getting tons of little girly accessories for it like dog beds & babies & mini-vans. I LOVED doll houses when I was little. I always wanted a big one with all the fixins and I'm so excited that you are getting one. The whole family is helping buy it for you.

Too young you say? yes maybe.... but we have 14,349 toys around here that are plenty age appropriate for now and you will love them until you are proper enough to play with the doll house.

Halloween was just a couple of weeks ago.... and you & Carter looked SO cute in your little costumes. Carterbug was a monkey & you were his banana. Very creative huh? Mama & Daddy took you to the Zoo Boo and you were wonderful.... wore your little pumpkin outfit & looked around at everyone all day. You are very peaceful outdoors.... you LOVE being outside which is no surprise at all because this house is full of outdoorsmen.

You are still very basic so there isn't a whole lot to tell you. You are becoming more and more curious about things by the day, you enjoy being carried around so that you can see everything, you are starting to really pay attention to your brother & the tv, you are sleeping well at night, and you really enjoy sleeping on your belly & nana's shoulder.

Love you sweet girl.... your brother is starting to yell mama louder and louder.... I think he is trying to escape his crib.

Happy three months! We are all so in love with you! Thank you for making our family complete!

Love~ Mama

....... the post with no title

2010-11-05T12:33:00.001-07:00

I am in a big huge hurry. HUGE big. Which explains why there is no title... I'm in such a hurry- I have no time to think of one. So.... these pictures really quickly.....

next time you see a cute little picture of my two happy babies that look like this:
keep in mind that it probably took something along the lines of THIS to get it:
These two are a blast. I LOVE them to pieces and we are super happy that they live in our house. Photo-shoots with them are hilarious.

oh... and these were this year's halloween costumes.... if you hadn't already figured that out. Carter was a monkey, Clove was his banana. :)

Thanks for checking in..... off to change diapers, clean up spills, put toys away, make homemade chicken & noodles for dinner, put out fires, and save the world...... all in an evening's time. I'm getting better and better at this working mom of two thing everyday. :)

gymboree

2010-11-01T15:48:00.000-07:00

Carter & I had a very special Mommy & Carter day today..... well.... at least for a couple of hours. I can only leave Clove for so long with her being attached to the boobs and all.

Zach & I are enrolling Carter in classes at Gymboree.... and if you haven't heard of Gymboree.... well- it's pretty much the coolest place on earth, next to Disney World. Or so we think so after our class today.

Carter & I joined the art class today.... and silly me for assuming that it was just going to be about art. I thought we'd glue cotton balls to construction paper & it was really so much more than just that.

We started out by playing with Play-doh for a little bit.... and Carter LOVES Play-doh, note to Santa.
.... and then after a song & dance.... we had snack time & a story.

... and he drank so well from his dixie cup. He's really getting the hang of doing that now. I'm so proud.
and then we painted...... Carter's is the 4th one. Notice the kid's to the left of his. His mom totally cheated and helped him out. The kid was cute but not THAT talented. birds, trees, house? that stuff is overrated.
close-up of Carterbug's painting.... held by the red clips. It looks beautiful here.... but much better on our refrigerator....
and then we sang again, danced around the room, played with big rubber shapes.... and then the sand table.... which he also loved.....
my little sand table stud.
paint.
wait a minute.... these are out of order.... either way, this is the sand again....

and then another project! a turkey art project with construction paper, glue, colored macaroni, and feathers.....

his turkey masterpiece:
after the turkey project- we danced & sang again.... and then stuck rubber like shapes & designs to the wall..... and then the teacher stamped our hands (and Carterbug's belly) and we took off.

and the ride home..... my little picasso.... worn out.

and this little sweetheart was there to greet us when we got back!

zoo boo.

2010-10-22T16:53:00.000-07:00

Went to zoo boo today at the indianapolis zoo and we all had so much fun. It was Carter's 2nd time to the zoo this year and he was much more interested in the animals this time around. We also rode the carousel and he loved it.... he rode once with mama and once with daddy.

Clover slept nearly the whole time and when she was awake she rode in the baby carrier. She looked sweet as can be in her little pumpkin hat.

We're all home safe now.... eating chili, snuggling, and watching toy story....

here are the babies today.... Carter in his monkey costume & Clover in her pumpkin dress (her costume wouldn't work with the baby carrier)

pictures from the zoo coming soon.....

it's official:

2010-10-15T06:15:00.000-07:00

i have the sweetest little boy in the world. There is no doubt in my mind & I dare anyone to argue. There are a few occasional moments of chaos with him. Sometimes he throws things when he gets mad but usually only when he's tired. AND... he can't help it that he was born to Zach. :)

Those crazy moments though, with Carter, are so short-lived. He is SUCH a sweetheart. I'm so excited to see what kind of man he will grow to be. He already shows us in so many ways that he is a humanitarian. He's so sweet & kind when it comes to others and he LOVES to share his things. When Clover cries... he is always so quick to tend to her with hugs & kisses. He truly amazes me with how helpful & sweet he is with her at his young little age.

I am so proud of him and I am so thankful that God blessed me with the sweetest little boy in the world!

Our 200th POST!

2010-10-11T09:54:00.001-07:00

Goodness sakes! 200 posts! :) let's celebrate with a picture! Clover loves tummy time.... can't you tell? She's having a blast! And Carter does such a beautiful job of keeping her entertained while she tries to learn how to lift her head.

Life is SOOOOOO good. Either that or I've had way too much coffee today. Could be a combination of both.

The house is clean, the babies are both napping, and I am so happy to have a little bit of quiet time. Hot shower- check. Load of laundry started- check. Few pictures from recent photo-sessions edited- check. blog post- underway.

I actually, believe it or not, am at a loss for words. There isn't much to report. I have been super busy.... and I'm so grateful that I'm finally feeling much better because being sick & trying to care for a house with 2 babies is a lot more than I anticipated. I'm still trying to catch up on scrapbooks, sew little outfits & quilts, and Zach and I started a study together this past week. Zach is hunting when he can, I am taking lots of pictures lately for random people, and we're trying to spend as much time together as possible.

You'll be happy to know that this week.... I am doing a photo session with Carter. A real session. At least that's the plan. I have an outfit picked out, a location picked out, a sitter for Clover, and the camera battery is charged. I'm excited to get some good pictures of him, aside from the everyday snapshots that we take around the house.

And hopefully.... we won't get too much of this:

sick. :(

2010-10-07T05:55:00.000-07:00

Please excuse the boring title. I feel like total rubbish today.... even worse than yesterday.... but I've just remembered that I promised a story & didn't end up getting around to it because I feel as if someone has beaten me in the head with a hammer.

Forgive me for not being able to share the story today. I promise it will come soon. But here's a picture to hold you over. This is from Carter's Day in The Life project. Perhaps my favorite image of the day. It's nothing special technical wise.... but it has so much meaning.

Honestly.... if I felt better.... I could go on for hours about this image. Why I love it, what it means, how significant morning time in our home is....

But have you ever heard that a picture is worth a thousand words? This one is. And it speaks major volumes.

I. LOVE. this. image.

more than words. which is why it's probably most appropriate that I post it today, since I am nearly word-less anyhow.

Now.... I'm off to take some more tylenol & curl up for Beauty & The Beast with Carterbug.

our new bunk bed.

2010-10-05T15:59:00.001-07:00

or at least Carter thinks that it is. He never ceases to make us laugh. Can't wait to tell the story of what he did this afternoon. I sent Zach a text message about it while he was at work & he said that laughed so hard that he cried. The kid is crazy.

And that is precisely what that look on Clove's face says: "The kid is crazy."

Love her, love him, LOVE THEM BOTH to pieces!

I'll share today's story tomorrow.... that'll be 3 days of posts in a row! I bet Aunt Danita will be so proud! :)

SO much to share... so very little time.

2010-10-04T09:55:00.000-07:00

It's true. I am swamped. Swimming in a big pool of scrapbook paper, half done pages, piles of material and half-sewn dresses, a quilt that has been "almost" finished for 3 weeks, 2 busy busy babies, a big house to tidy, a husband to try and spend time with every evening, a job I've just started back to for 2 long days a week....

It's no secret that I have a lot on my plate. And all the while.... I am constantly picking up my camera and trying to document it all as best as I can. I've taken over 8 THOUSAND pictures since June.... in some crazy attempt to try and capture every little moment. That's really hard to imagine isn't it?

I have not a single regret about taking all of these images.... when we sort back through them on the computer screen- we crack up, we cry, we remember.... I am so grateful that I LOVE my camera and it definitely shows. Zach and I will regularly sit down at the computer and go through all of the pictures.... and you'll hear things like: "Oh my word- look at him", "look how little she was", "he's so funny", "she's so cute", and last night- if you had been here.... you would have heard: "OMG- does she have Grandpa Bert's ears?!"

Wolmas: I now present you with Clove's Grandpa Bert impersonation.... and it is GOOD. I dare you to disagree. kindof scary to be honest but still.... it has to be shared don't you think?

What I do hate is that all these images are digital, they are on my computer and not in an album, and that there are SO many good ones to choose from, print, share, blog, scrapbook..... it's very overwhelming.

Who exactly was I kidding when I decided months ago that I would take my favorite photos from each month.... put them in an album and make just ONE scrapbook page a piece for each baby for each month of their lives.

The album part..... not happening. I've not had any images printed since Clover was two weeks old. The scrapbook page part.... well. It's okay. I have finished one page for Clover's first month and a page for her birth.... so she is caught up on. I finished one for Carter last month and although his book isn't "caught up".... it's going to be if each month of scrapbooking goes like last month did. I did good. Hopefully I can keep it up because I really enjoy it & it's great for them. Win-Win.

Here's the page for Clover's first month: sorry I don't have photos to share of the others yet.

I have so many hobbies, so many goals for myself, and so little time with 2 babies.

UPDATE on Clover:

I can't remember where I left off with Clover updates in the last blog.... and truth be told.... I don't even have a minute to go back and look at it so I'm just going to talk about how things have been going with her.

She is awesome. AWESOME, AWESOME, AWESOME. Today... it is 1:04 pm and she hasn't shed a single tear all day. She is very very happy & calm. She wakes up around 9 am, has breakfast, kicks around in her little vibrating chair, has a snack, takes a nap, plays in the floor with Carter, eats lunch, plays, naps....... eat, sleep, play, repeat. That's her life. And she is living it to the fullest. I'm so proud of her.

NOW. This is a different story on days that mama is not home. When I am at work- Clover is a mess. She absolutely refuses a bottle. She will not take breastmilk from anything but a breast. We have tried at least 7 or 8 different bottles/nipples, we've tried medicine droppers, syringes, any sort of liquid holding device you can imagine..... When I am at work- she is not happy. And poor Zach & Carter have their hands full. Right now, needless to say, weekends at our house are not fun.

Please pray that she will get the hang of it soon. We've finally found a bottle that she is latching onto but she will only take a few gulps and then she gives up and screams for a little bit before latching on again, taking a few gulps, and then screaming. It took Zach over an hour yesterday to get her to take 2 ounces of milk. not good.

I hate to wish her little life away because she is so tiny, sweet, & beautiful.... not to mention, she may be our last baby so I want to soak in every bit of the newborn stage....

But- with that being said.... I look forward to her being able to eat from a spoon. We can at least mix her milk with cereal and spoon-feed her so that she doesn't go hungry.

The pediatrician said that she, unfortunately, may never take a bottle. Most babies (which is a very small 4% by the way) that refuse a bottle.... will continue to refuse a bottle until they are able to drink from a cup. Speaking of her doctor.... here is a picture of her at her 8 week checkup last week:

ahh! Don't you just want to pick her up and squeeze her?! Look at how edible she looks! So cute & chubby. I love those cheeks & those little rolls on her thighs. She is absolutely perfect.

Clover hasn't always been a joy. For two solid weeks- she was miserable and we were all on the verge of being miserable as well.

and then there was prevacid. the miracle drug.

she is a new baby. unbelievable how happy that prevacid has made her. She cried a lot for 2 weeks. I was worried that we had a monster baby.... and it turns out she just had a belly ache. Nothing a little modern medicine didn't fix.... she is back to her sweet, quiet little self. Now if we could just get her to take some milk from her dada.... she'd be happy 7 days a week instead of just 5.

Some new pictures to share: just a few of the several thousand.

*still working on Carter's Day In The Life Project..... here's another image from that day....

This one is of Carter at my friend Gretchen's.... he loves the sandbox. And because he is totally in love with the sandbox, mama & daddy have just done some sandbox shopping. :) Carter's new favorite hobby: wearing everyone else's shoes. And daddy's shoes fit him the best.
Clover's first smile captured with a camera: precious.
my sweet little girl. have I shared this one yet? I can't remember.
another one of Clove... looking a LOT like her brother did at this age other than the blue eyes.
another day in the life image: Carterbug reaching for apples at Appleworks.
Clover... looking cute as ever in the first outfit that I made her. Well- the first outfit I've ever made for that matter. And I was so excited when I pulled it out of her closet one day & realized that she would fit in it! I'm in the middle of making her a few other little outfits... and I'm having so much fun doing it. Can't wait to see her in more little things that I've made. Carterbug playing in the yard.... the kid can't get enough of the outdoors. He LOVES being outside. I wish the weather were nicer this week because this morning when I took him out.... Clover & I nearly froze to death. :( Boo for cold weather!
Are we blessed or what? God is great. God is good. Let us thank him for this life.

Amen.

it's moments like this....

2010-09-16T12:57:00.000-07:00

.... that make me grab my camera.

.... that make me smile from ear to ear.

.... that make a bad day suddenly good.

.... that make being a mom so amazing.

.... that make me fall in love with these babies all over again.

.... that make me stop everything I'm doing and thank God....

.... for these two INCREDIBLE little creatures that make my life so worth living. Garsh... I love my babies.

dear carter. month 18

2010-09-10T21:36:00.000-07:00

[ carter's first trip to chuck-e-cheese . august 22 ]

Carterbug,

My darling & handsome little man. You are the coolest little boy and I haven't any doubt that you will only get to be more awesome with time. Your little personality is just incredible. I LOVE month 18 so far. One of my favorites.... despite your little tantrums now and then. And speaking of those tantrums- it does seem as if month 18 has brought with it a weird sort of raging lunatic in you. Every few days you'll have minutes of chaos where it seems to me as if your little brain is just unwinding itself and you're acting like a total freak-show kid that I've never seen before.

It's during those few minutes that I just shake my head, go into the other room, and let you act all sorts of crazy until you get it out of your system. In all honesty.... most times, I think it's absolutely hilarious and I have to leave the room to keep from laughing because that might encourage you to act like that all the time and let's be honest: a few minutes of it is funny but if you acted like that more than just a few minutes- you'd live in that rubbermaid container in your closet.

[ playing in the curtains . august 31st ]

You have a MOUTH full of teeth popping through your gums. And this, I'm sure, is exactly what explains the wild behavior I just jabbered on about. You know what? I'll be honest. I guess I am a rotten mother because I have not kept up with that glorious tooth log in your baby book. So one day.... when you're a sophomore in high school & you want to get your baby book out to show all of your friends.... I'll expect that you'll probably curse me for not filling out the tooth log. Let me just go ahead and apologize for that right here and now:

I'M SORRY.

You have too many coming in too quickly for me to keep track of..... and seriously. A lot of that baby book stuff is really important & interesting. When your teeth popped through your gums.... not so much.

So right now- you have gobs of teeth coming through. Daddy peeked into your mouth the other day during a diaper change & declared that you had 8 teeth coming in..... that sounds terrible and it's a true miracle to me that you don't freak out more often than you do. I feel very sorry for you.

Your sister showed up last month. She's out of my belly & lives in our house..... and you LOVE her. You are totally infatuated with her and I often wonder to myself how long this infatuation will last. You are forever hugging and kissing all over her....

[ comforting clover . august 31st ]

I could not be anymore proud of you. INCREDIBLE doesn't even begin to describe the big brother that you are to Clover. You are definitely her biggest fan and you help with her more than I could have ever imagined. When I go to change her diaper.... you are toddling along close behind ready to hand mama wipes or pat her head if she cries. You'll sometimes just go into her room and grab diapers and bring them to me as if you think she may need changed.

When she cries.... you are johnny on the spot. You run like mad to get to her and then pat her & put your little arms around her or your head next to hers until someone comes to help. I could have never dreamt that you would be so loving with her. In all honesty.... I knew that you would 'eventually' be a good big brother but I really thought that you would ignore her for the first several months.

You NEVER ignore her. In fact Carter- there have been dozens of occasions where she is sleeping or resting peacefully and I've prayed that you would ignore her for a little bit. First thing in the morning.... when I come to get you our of your crib.... you're on a mission to find Clover. You're on a mad rush to run straight to the master bedroom so you can peer into her basinet and poke on her cheeks. Needless to say.... when you're awake.... everyone else in the house is too.... and just when they think they may sleep a little longer~ you prove otherwise. Mornings are so much fun for the four of us when Daddy is at home. You make the decision on when everyone should be awake, we rescue you from your crib after hearing you jumping up & down in it, we all pile up in mama & daddy's bed and play for at least an hour together, and then daddy fixes us all a nice breakfast. I LOVE our family. I LOVE you and what you are bringing to our everyday lives.

[ clover's one month birthday . august 29th ]

I've made it a point recently to make positively sure that you are getting plenty of hugs, snuggles, and kisses. I don't want you to feel left out one bit because your sister has arrived. You and her are both very well taken care of.... getting plenty of attention and you never go un-noticed or un-attended to. Mama loves showering you both with lots and lots of love. Trouble with that is.... it turns out that showering two babies, which you both very well are, with lots of love.... means that mama goes un-noticed.

My hair, most days, is an absolute mess until about 3 pm when I rush around like a crazy person trying to get myself in order before your daddy comes home. I tell him often that I don't even look in the mirror most days until at least 3 or 4 in the afternoon and I don't think he takes me seriously. It's an absolute miracle if I get to take a 15 minute shower, much less shave my legs. gross, I know.... and something that you probably don't necessarily want to read about. The reason I am telling you this is because I want you to know that I wouldn't trade a bit of this crazy life of mine for anything else on earth. I would go a hundred days without a shower if it meant keeping you as happy & healthy as you are. I know that one day.... when you have babies of your own.... you will completely understand this love that I have for you and your sister.

Random things that you're doing & that you love at 18 months:

You're SO into Mickey Mouse. still. I've mentioned this in previous letters but it seems as if your unconditional love for Mickey has grown. And you're really becoming pretty infatuated with Donald Duck & Goofy too. You have a few books with all characters in them and you often bring them to me and point at everyone over and over again while I tell you who is who. It's no surprise that I can ask you who each character is and you'll point right at them. You're incredibly smart. I can ask you to do complicated tasks.... and you'll do them without missing a beat. For instance.... this morning you were pushing your tonka truck all over the living room and I asked you to pick up the white ball in the floor and put it in your truck.... you headed straight to it. You're also starting to differentiate your golf clubs. You have three of them.... a driver, a putter, and a wedge. I ask you to hand mama the putter.... and you're able to pick it out. Sometimes you get a bit confused but you're getting there.

You LOVE to build things. We have a big truck full of blocks and you could put those blocks together for hours. Often... I build things with you while I nurse Clover and it's a win win win for all of us.... especially me because I'm totally proud of my multi-tasking skills.

You love being outside. We've spent entire days playing outside and it's not enough time for you.... we'll come in and 20 minutes later.... you're pointing at the door again.

You love nana & papa's house. We're there often because they live so close.... and I am forever grateful that we live next to them because they are an incredible help to us. We're so blessed to have them. There isn't a single day that goes by that they don't call to check on us or come by to visit. Nana loves to buy you bananas & grapes at the store and frequently brings them by. I thank God for them everyday as they are such a huge portion of our support system. I don't know what on earth I would do without their help.... and you are totally in love with them both. Papa came over this morning to help daddy with something and you squealed when you saw him.... with both of your arms outstretched. It's no secret that they are head over heels in love with you.... and the feeling is mutual.

You're still taking naps, sometimes two in a day.

You love the cat.... and she loves you. She chases after you like a little dog would and you'll turn around now and then and make funny cat sounds at her.

You've been a very picky eater recently. You're struggling with keeping your food on your tray and get in trouble for throwing it on the floor after nearly every meal.

I think your favorite two things in the world right now (other than Mickey Mouse) are remote controls and cell phones. You tote them around everywhere. When we go to anyones house.... it's difficult keeping you from totally reprogramming their televisions and calling foreign countries on their cell phones.

You are coming to us when your pants are dirty and holding your diaper so we've just bought you a potty chair. There hasn't been a day yet that has gone completely through without you toting that potty chair out into the living room and taking it apart.

You love tractors and cars. You'll go out into the garage and sit on daddy's tractor for an hour pushing & pulling all the buttons and the wheel. We've been watching a farm video together and when the tractors come up on the screen- you start pointing and yelling like crazy.

You also love water. You love to play in the hose.... and when we go outside and I don't volunteer to turn it on- you go over and point at it until I do. It's amazing how our time outside has almost developed into a sort of routine. You have a specific plan going out there..... first it's the water hose, then it's picking up sticks, then you're off to the dirt piles to stomp around.... and then we go for a walk around the yard and on the walking path at the edge of our property. After that.... I typically bribe you with a popsickle or a drink and you come rushing towards the patio.

[ playing in the yard in his jammies & daddy's socks, per his request . august 23rd ]

As I'm typing this now.... I can see you in the garage (the door is open) and you have just been scolded for digging in the cat foot. Daddy picked up the container to bring it in and you've just looked at me with those big eyes of yours and put both hands up in the air as if to say.... "What the heck? Why can't I dig in the cat food?" You are such a boy.... you've just grabbed hold of a big cardboard cylinder and are pushing it around the kitchen. Everything you touch turns into a stick or a pushcart. You're wearing nothing but shorts and your diaper is sticking out the top in the back... your chubby belly sticking out above them in the front. You're barefoot and your curly hair is tossed about all over your head.

[ modeling clover's sunglasses . and I don't know what I like more- the glasses that don't fit or the big curl on his forehead . this was just prior to his latest haircut . september 6th ]

Well.... it seems as if this letter could go on forever. I hope I have given you a small glimpse into what life with you is like right now. I LOVE life with you in it. You make daddy & I smile constantly.

Love you baby boy.... happy 18 months. You seem to be in love with life at this age... hopefully that will never ever change.

love, Mama.....

yesterday: day in the life

2010-09-10T12:00:00.000-07:00

did another day in the life project with Carter yesterday.... I did one of these when he was 8 months old as well.... if some of you remember.

took 689 photos of him throughout the day yesterday.... and I'm in the process of sorting through them all and will eventually compile them into a small album.

the point?: to tell the story of an average day in his little 18 month old life.

I plan to do this at least once every year with each baby and do an album for each, telling the story of the day, as well as telling them what's going on in their lives at that time.... what they like, what we do, where we like to go.... etc.

anyway.... only picked through a few favorites so far.... and here are a couple of them:

we're having an awesome day today.... neither baby has cried once and it's 3 pm! :)

looking forward to another wonderful weekend with my 3 favorite people.... hope everyone else has a great weekend as well! ~ J.

update on Clover

2010-09-04T09:25:00.000-07:00

She's having a much better day today & she's sleeping noticeably more.

that cluster feeding is for the birds.

I did some research and figured out that she's been getting too much fore-milk, not enough hind milk.... which totally explains why she's been wanting to nurse so often and why she's been fussy when she's not nursing.

Here I thought she was spoiled.... and she's just been hungry & had belly aches from lactose overload. poor little thing.

So- she's happy for now.... hopefully we've figured it all out.... and I'm going to try & do some things to boost my milk supply here in the next few weeks before my maternity leave is over. Thank goodness I only go back to work 2 days a week or else we would probably have to consider supplementing.

We have the whole weekend at home with almost no plans other than to celebrate Zach's birthday tomorrow evening with his family.... and I'm so happy that we don't have anywhere to be or anything that has to be done. It's a much needed little vacation for us as these past 3 weekends have been filled with things to do and Zach has been out of town & having to work overtime.

I need rest. I've been trying to keep up with this Bible study, trying to finish a quilt that I started for Clover last week, trying to catch up on Carter's scrapbook, trying to put together a birth video of Clover, trying to put together a one year video slideshow of Carter..... ALL on top of keeping up with the housework & taking care of two babies. yikes. what have I been thinking?

I am a PRIME candidate for an ADD poster.

Hope all is well with everyone.... I'll add some recent images of Carter.... I've finally figured out that he is 18 months old and if I want to capture photos of him- they will all have to be candids of him playing. All the kiddo does is play....

so in this past week I've made it a point to follow him around a lot more with my camera and I've snapped some great images of him in the process. I have so many to go through (over 300 pictures just taken in the last 2 days) but for now... here are a couple of favorite snapshots of him playing this week.....

he is so precious. so happy that I've given up on trying to get professional shots of him and just chasing him around snapping a few pictures of him playing here and there. now if I could just convince myself to delete a few of all the duplicate shots.... I suppose that having taken over 8000 pictures just since June is a little ridiculous.....

my baby is screaming.....

2010-09-02T12:32:00.000-07:00

....so this isn't going to be long at all. Clover is screaming her head off. She's been cluster feeding in these past few days (eating too often & not enough with each feeding) so she isn't getting the hind milk.... which is the good, fattening stuff that keeps her full. So- she's hungry.

and it's sad.

Zach is getting her some formula on his way home so that we can fill her belly up & I'm working to try & get her on a better feeding schedule. She's a stubborn little thing, we've come to figure out. But I'm sure that once all this is sorted- she'll be a whole new girl. She just needs to stay awake & eat.... no big deal right?

seriously.... I know I may be a little biased.... but are these not the most precious little babies?? ..... I think I must be the luckiest mama on earth.

clover- taken on her 1 month birthday- Sunday August 29th

Carterbug- taken yesterday. month 18

"big hugs"

2010-08-30T12:13:00.001-07:00

so.... sometimes his hugs are a bit aggressive but he loves her and that is obvious.
I couldn't be more proud of him.... still.

Sometimes I see him hugging on her & can't help but wonder when this fascination that he has with her might end. But day after day- he continues on loving her just like the day before. He is crazy about her and I imagine that eventually.... she'll stop ignoring him & she'll be crazy about him too.

I am super crazy about them both.

my babies

2010-08-29T08:43:00.000-07:00

just sharing a favorite picture.... don't have time for chatting. Zach is out of town so it's been hectic. Thank God for supportive family members.... we are so blessed as I don't have a clue what I would have done by myself all weekend.

Clover is ONE MONTH old today already. So hard to believe. I have her one month letter half written & some photos gathered for editing.... so I'll try & post those soon.

Thanks for checking in! ~ J.

THREE years ago.....

2010-08-25T09:42:00.000-07:00

.... I married an incredible man.
.... I married my best friend.
.... I married my high school sweetheart.
.... I married the man of my dreams.
.... I married the father of my children.

and TODAY:

I couldn't be happier or feel more blessed.
I couldn't possibly ask for anything more.
I couldn't be more proud of what the two of us have accomplished together.
I couldn't be more excited about the beautiful babies we've created with God's help.
I couldn't have any more anticipation about our future.....
.... and all the anniversaries and years to come.

We have so much to be thankful for & so much to look forward to.

I am so blessed to have married Zach. He makes me the happiest woman on earth. He's given me the most beautiful babies I could ever ask for and the two of us have far more in this life than we could have ever imagined.

God is good. Marriage is good. Love is good. Life is good.

Happy Anniversary to the love of my life.

compare & contrast

2010-08-25T09:28:00.001-07:00

Somedays I look down at Clover when she's sleeping in my lap or when she nurses.... and I feel like I'm looking at Carter all over again.

-and then there are other days when she opens up those big blue eyes and I think.... "wow... she looks so much different than Carterbug"

it's amazing how much she changes day by day....

For the most part- I think she looks a lot like Carter did at her age, other than the blue eyes. Her hair is lighter, her chin is less pronounced, and her nose is just a little different. What's very interesting to Zach & I both is that they sound just alike. In an effort to put together a video of Carter's first year- we've been sorting through thousands of images & hundreds of videos so we've heard a lot of crying out of Carter in his early days and seen a lot of those early newborn expressions of his. Their cries sound very similar and a lot of their little expressions look identical.

anyway.... see for yourself. These images were both taken during the third week of their lives.

Here's one that I took of her awake the other day....
and this one is old.... old as in a couple of months old.... I think I took it in May. I'm too lazy to look it up right this minute but it was taken at least 2 months ago.... probably closer to three. Not my favorite picture ever but still really cute of my happy boy. I love him so much. Wish his teeth were not bothering him so much this week. He's been a little grumpier than usual, not himself. I'll be glad when this teething thing is over.

birthdays

2010-08-20T06:31:00.001-07:00

well... kind of.

Carter was 18 months old yesterday and Clover was 3 weeks.

yikes. time flies. and I cried about it.

but then- Zach came home, I dried my tears, and we took the babies to the park. Here are pictures of our beautiful babies on their birthday. :)

thanks for checking in on us ~ J.

growing like a weed....

2010-08-18T18:05:00.001-07:00

funny huh?

clover is growing like a weed. :) haha.

really, she is. She is getting so big. Newborn diapers are getting tighter and she's starting to grow into her 0-3 months outfits. Thank goodness! Because there is a whole slew of pink in her room that I was afraid she wouldn't wear because she was a little-bit at birth (compared to Carterbug) and summer is going to be over in just a few short weeks.

anyway.... not much time for typing this evening because Zach just came in from mowing, it's nearly nine o'clock, and we haven't had dinner yet! yikes.

before I go.... a bible verse that God brought to my attention today:

"Don't use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them." ~ Ephesians 4:29

did you read that.... REALLY? what a challenge! Let EVERYTHING you say be good.....

I'm working on this, replaying this verse in my head throughout the day, and trying to make it a point to live by it.

so next time you hear me talking smack about someone- you need to remind me of Ephesians 4:29. m'kay?

..... and since I don't regularly talk about people- maybe you could also remind me of this verse when I'm being a debbie downer.

Zach did tonight. I threw a small fit because he had to mow the grass.

I know- you're thinking- "Seriously Jamie?" but let me try & explain (quickly because I have to eat).

He worked overtime over the weekend. Monday night was poker night. Last night he worked out in the garage. Tomorrow night- he is working on the car. Saturday he is going to an auction. Next weekend he will be out of town from Friday morning until late Sunday night.

I want my husband back! I'm tired of feeling like a single mom. 13 consecutive days with these babies all day long and little to no sightings of their daddy is bound to make me pull my hair out.

So tonight.... when I put on my mean face & asked why he was going to the garage.... Zach reminded me that I was being negative, he assured me that he needed to mow the grass because our yard looks terrible and the neighbors are probably wondering if we died, and then he reminded me that this is what life is like with a home, jobs, and two babies. I was being unrealistic he said. It's not realistic of me to forget that we have things to take care of and he can't just come home from work everyday and sit on the couch while I sew dresses and write novels and bounce babies on my knee.

What do you mean I CAN'T have two happy kids, write novels, sew dresses, spend time with my husband EVERY single day, maintain a clean house, work out regularly, complete intensive Bible studies, keep the hamper empty, the dishes done, the yard manicured, and dinner on the table..... and always keep a smile!?!??? OF COURSE I CAN!!??

anyway.... I'm glad he set me straight. he's right. good grief, I can't have it all.

... and when God wrote Proverbs 31.... that woman He was talking about..... she was NOT me. besides.... I don't even know what flax is.... or how to spin it for that matter.

blessed:

2010-08-16T12:56:00.001-07:00

these two are amazing. simply amazing.

and there are just no other words right now.....

i'm speechless.

just a quick update

2010-08-15T18:02:00.000-07:00

[carter makes an attempt to remove the hardwood floor cleaner from the closet in the nude]

today was much better. clover cried less. mama stressed less. the house is clean. mama is clean. carterbug is clean.

.... and after carterbug cleaned up this afternoon.... he jumped straight out of the tub and decided that it was the perfect opportunity to clean the hardwood flooring in the nude.

i guess we can mark that off of his bucket list.

hopefully clover's fussiness was just something i had eaten. it's going to take me awhile to figure out which foods bother her. right now- i think i've narrowed it down to onions and dairy products. (which stinks by the way because i cannot get enough ice cream)

so.... carter is sound asleep and clover is laying here next to me in the vibrating chair getting mighty impatient. the downfall of these past 24 hours is that she has been spoilt rotten with attention and snuggles.... so now she insists on being held for great lengths of time.

hopefully.... this too shall pass.

guess what? I'm so stinking excited.....

i've been wanting to start a Bible study for months. i've asked several people if they wanted to join me to no avail so i kept putting it off for reasons such as.....

.... i'll do it when i find someone who will do it with me (and I never did)

.... i'll start it when i get to weekend option (and I never started it despite starting that position 6 or 7 weeks ago)

.... i'll start it when I find my study Bible in the moving boxes (and I went through them all but never found it)

.... i'll do it when clover starts sleeping through the night (goodness knows when that will be really)

I decided today that there is no better day than tomorrow. I am starting a Bible study tomorrow. by myself and without my study Bible and with a baby who doesn't sleep through the night and on my maternity leave from my weekend option position.

and I'm thrilled about it. I read some reviews online for it tonight.... and I'm going to read the intro before I go to bed.

It's ten weeks long although it may take me a little longer..... let's be honest. I'm giving myself 12 weeks to do it. It's a workbook accompanied by DVDs, although I don't have the DVD set so I'm going to have to pay to download them online.

I'll be in touch regarding my progress on that.... because I think it will be wonderful.

but for now.... zach and I are off to watch an episode of criminal minds and eat some ice cream!

please pray for clover.... pray that her belly aches stop and that she doesn't want to use mama as a human pacifier anymore so that I can spend more time playing with carter without a newborn attached to one of my boobs. :)

and then there was a rough day....

2010-08-14T13:12:00.001-07:00

so today was rough.

and it's the first day that I'd admit was difficult. day 16 came about and it was rough.

not all of it.... just moments of it. and the day is not over yet.... it's sure to turn out to be great.

I've been blessed with day after day of goodness from both babies.... they've slept, eaten, snuggled, and played without too much fussing. never anything I couldn't handle.

sure, there have been days where I haven't showered. there have been days with no lunch for mama. there have been days when the laundry starts to pile up a little higher and there are a few dishes that never find their way into the washer.....

but it's been pretty good.

no breakdowns. no tantrums. no major belly aches.

until today.

my sweet little girl is making her presence known in the house. she's experiencing some fussiness and her poor little brother is at wits end. he's tried to comfort her to no avail.

she continues to cry.

and really.... the crying is over now and to look back.... it did only last but a total of about 90 minutes.

it's unfortunate that her screaming and Carter's impatience was accompanied by a horrendous headache for mama. these past 3 days.... I've had awful headaches.... some even waking me up in the middle of the night. I don't know for sure but my educated guesses say that they're hormone related. pregnancy hormones are dropping fast.... and my brain is apparently struggling to adjust.

thank God for nana & papa. for petes sake.... I just don't have a clue what I would do without them. who knew when we decided that this was the perfect house.... that it would end up being a wonderful place to live because of all the much needed visits from the two of them with them living so close.

they just happened to pop in amid all the chaos..... and they saved the day.... and my sanity.

Clover is resting (not so comfortably and fussing periodically) in mama's lap, Carter is playing at nana & papa's house, and here I sit still with a headache hoping & praying that when this princess wakes up from her nap.... her belly aches will be a thing of the past. oh dear.... 90 minutes of crying is enough for one day.

Perhaps today wouldn't have been so bad if my husband were home. He's at work.... on a Saturday.... and last time he called (in the middle of all the screaming mind you) he said that he'd be home sometime around "six or seven". Not something I wanted to hear at 2:45.

12 consecutive days with him being at work. I'm trying to look at the positive side of things. He only works 8 hours. I suppose it could be worse right? He could work 10 or 12 hour days.... and I keep reminding myself that he's only on call for one weekend a month. ONE. and this is the one. thank goodness when it's over.... he'll be done for awhile.

So- big deal right? today is the first rough day out of 16. big deal, she cried for an hour & a half. It's better than the six hours a day for months that my sister & brother-in-law had to endure with their baby girl. so big deal- i haven't eaten since last night and it's nearly five pm.

positives?:

the house was clean this morning before we all climbed out of bed so other than some scattered toys.... it's still clean.

carter is enjoying some playtime with nana & papa which is wonderful for all three of them. They enjoy having him and he LOVES to be at their house.

zach's paycheck will be nice.

my waistline is shrinking more quickly than I expected & I had lost all my pregnancy weight when Clover was just 10 days old.

homemade dinner is ready in the refrigerator thanks to great friends.

the princess got a package in the mail today with three beautiful new headbands.

and this precious photo......

carter comforting his sister.

when she cries.... he hugs her, rests beside her, and brings her toys & blankies to make her feel better.

in this picture.... you can't see all of it.... but he has his two favorite blankies, a paci, a balloon, and some building blocks tucked into her chair.... all in an attempt to try and make her happy.

you can tell she means so much to him and it amazes me because he is so young and innocent to be so sweet, giving, and lovable.

we'll have more rough spots ahead, I'm sure of it.....

but the beauty of that image and the emotions that it evokes for me make it all worth it.

these two are incredible..... i don't have words nearly eloquent enough to express my love for them. i'm so thankful that they're here experiencing this life with us....

we have so much to look forward to.... good days and not-so-good days are ahead.... and I look forward to them all.

quickly... before they wake up....

2010-08-11T10:23:00.000-07:00

both babies are sound asleep..... so sweet, both of them. We've had an awesome morning here. Things are just unbelievable really. Each day that goes by I only cross my fingers and say my prayers asking that our next day be just as good.

so far.... it works. God answers and He answers in such a great way.

We are so incredibly proud of Carter. He is taking on the big brother role with flying colors. Zach & I were just talking last night after they were both tucked into their beds about how awesome he is and how pleased we are with how well everything has gone. Zach keeps reminding me.... "It's still early".... and I realize this but goodness.... the first 13 days of Clover's little life have been a dream.

When I was pregnant- I anticipated something horribly awful. I'm not sure why.... I tried to convince myself that everything would be just fine but there was a complete nervousness about me and a total uneasiness about this whole mama of two business.

It turns out that God knew better and I was overreacting. I wonder if I think things are so perfect now because I had anticipated something so much worse. Not only have I been able to manage the two of them... our laundry room has stayed clean, the hampers empty, the floors mopped, my hair fixed, and the sink has been free of dishes.

There are occasional moments when Carter is sleepy, Clover is hungry, and mama is 2 seconds away from pulling her hair out.... but in all honesty, I think I've experienced two of these moments in nearly 2 weeks and for that, I am thankful. 99% of the time.... all is calm.

I have so many new pictures and things to share.... and I'll get there, I promise. This week is a very busy one for us.... we have events, visitors, or places to go every single day....

and I'm enjoying every bit of it because it means that we have people who love us close by.... but I do look forward to a much quieter week next week.....

for now.... here are a couple more pictures I have taken....

I LOVE this next picture.... for so many reasons. It's pretty self-explanatory really.... I need not explain details of how it melts my heart and all that other gooey stuff that really is so true....
but one reason why I love it so very much that you may not know is that it reminds me a lot of another image I took 17 months ago...I haven't taken the time recently to brag about my husband. He is an incredible father. It's interesting.... when you marry someone.... you marry them knowing that they'll be a good husband and hoping that they'll be a good father if God should bless you with children.

The love that Zach and I have experienced since Carter's birth far exceeds anything I could have imagined feeling for him.

I knew that Zach would be a good husband. We had more than our fair share of late night talks and we did the whole marital counseling thing prior to marriage to be sure that our life goals & ideas were all in line. When I said "I do".... I was promising the rest of my life to a man who I knew was perfectly capable of being an incredible husband. I had no idea when I was repeating those vows that I was promising myself to an incredible father as well.

I can't keep thanking God enough.... because He knew. God knew that Zach would be the father that he is and I can't help but think that this is exactly why we married.

Zach has helped me bring two beautiful babies into this world and he helps me to love & nurture them every day. We make a good team.... the two of us..... at this parenting thing. We'll both make plenty of mistakes on this journey, sure, but it's impossible to look at the sweet 17 month old boy we have and gather that we're doing much of anything wrong. Carter is one of a kind. Hopefully he'll inspire his little sister to be just the same.

You know that saying.... "If something sounds too good to be true.... it probably is."

That's hogwash.

Everyday I wake up & I thank God for this life of mine because it seems too good to be true.... and I go to sleep at night with the same wonderful husband, the same beautiful babies, and the same too-good-to-be-true life.

If something is too good to be true- it's because God said so.... and you should thank Him for it continuously.

That's what I've done.... and He just keeps on giving.

"In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths." - Proverbs 3:6

mama's little model

2010-08-05T16:47:00.000-07:00

So many photoshoots already for this princess.... she is so much fun to photograph.... unlike her brother, who seems to be running straight away from the camera anymore when he sees it. :)

Hopefully he'll be a model again soon.... for right now with him- we just have lots of action shots.... which is all perfectly well because he's cute as can be regardless and all of these little snapshot pictures of him will be powerful reminders of just how active & busy he was during this stage.

I take her out just about everyday.... for 10-20 minutes and snap some pictures of her.... she is an incredible little model.... does everything I ask her to do. :)

These are some images that I got from our little photoshoot last night: isn't she precious!?
.... and this is just a snapshot of her napping in the swing. She loves the swing & her vibrating chair and spends quite a bit of time in each of them. She's so peaceful & calm.... hopefully this will never change.
She had her 1 week checkup today.... she weighed in at 8 pounds even so she has gained 2 ounces since birth which the doctor was quite happy with. He said that she looks just perfect & he doesn't have any concerns at all.

He also commented on how blue her little eyes are and said that they are likely to stay blue based on their light color now.... so it looks like Carterbug will be the only Wolma baby so far getting mama's eyes. She's starting to look more and more like him though and we actually spotted some of his newborn images last night that could be mistaken for her. I can't say that I'll be disappointed if they look just alike despite eye color because Carter is a such handsome little man.

Clover is good as can be. We are so blessed! She sleeps really well, eats really well, and rarely cries. The past 2 nights- she has only been up twice to eat and goes right back to sleep.

We know that it's too early yet to tell if these things will change.... but we're praying that she continues to eat, sleep, and nap just as well as she has been in this past week.

God is so GREAT to have blessed us with two sweet & happy babies.... we're amazed.

Thanks for checking in! ~ Jamie

my babies.... i am so darn proud

2010-08-03T12:32:00.001-07:00

I would definitely venture to brag that I am the PROUDEST mama in the world today. My eyes swell up with tears & my heart swells up with love when I look at these pictures. I am so thankful that God has given us such beautiful babies.... both of them are incredible in so many different little ways. I could not possibly love them anymore. This first picture of Carter doesn't seem like much of a big deal but it's such a special photo for me.

His little friend Alex came for a visit on Sunday afternoon & they completely destroyed the playroom in less than 10 minutes. It was wonderful. :)

Carter is such an awesome little boy when it comes to interacting with other babies. He shares everything. He is SO happy to hand over one of his little toys..... he's going to be such an incredible person.... and will continue to amaze us I'm sure with each and every day. He's an awesome big brother already and things could not be going any smoother here at home. I'm utterly speechless.
.... and would you look at this gorgeous little face.....

[baby clover . august 3rd . 5 days old]

It's obvious that she's looking more and more like daddy which makes me so happy because Carterbug tends to take after mama in the looks department. So many of my baby pictures resemble him completely.... and so I'm thrilled that little Clover has daddy's blonde hair & blue eyes. They may not stay blue... but the doctor predicts that they will and they have gotten lighter everyday so I wouldn't be surprised. One blue eyed baby girl and a brown eyed baby boy.... perfection.

Thanks for checking in. It means so much to me that we have family & friends who are thinking of us and want to see pictures of our beautiful babies.

We are happier than ever and totally in love with these two little ones.

God is awesome to say the least.

Clover's Newborn Session . Day 4

2010-08-02T22:55:00.001-07:00

Clover's newborn session was this evening and she was an INCREDIBLE little model. I remember thinking that Carter was such a good baby.... and his little sister is proving to be no different. She is such a little angel. She let us move and pose her all over the place tonight without a fuss.

okay... just one fuss.... when we put a hat on her that she obviously didn't like.... but other than her one minor breakdown over that silly hat- she was really pretty dreamy.

Here's a shot of our photographer, Marci, doing what she does best: .... and here's a shot that I took of Miss Clover while she was posing for Marci........... and here's our first official sneak peek photo from Marci..... Clover is posing as the princess from the princess & the pea! Isn't she darling??
here's another one.... one of the last shots that Marci took of the night.... and I am SO thankful that we had the idea to dangle her little leg outside of that box at the last minute.... how cute is she?

I'll post more as they come. Hope you've enjoyed...... I'm going to try & get Carterbug out for a few new pictures tomorrow..... wish me luck! :)

Clover- Day 4

2010-08-02T12:00:00.000-07:00

the whole house is napping.... except for mama.

Carter has been down for a nap for going on 3 hours. Clover & Zach are going on hour 2. And silly mama.... instead of sleeping- I'm updating the blog with a new picture of our little girl.

She's so wonderful.... still no complaints. Last night was a little rough as she was struggling with gassiness for a couple of hours. I'm sure that it must have been something I had eaten because today she has been dreamy as can be.

Her newborn session is this evening with Marci Ralph.... I look so forward to seeing what Miss Marci comes up with.

But here's a picture that I took this morning for now.....

best friends already.

2010-07-31T15:40:00.000-07:00

Carter is adjusting incredibly well to being a big brother. He rarely leaves her side.... always interested in what we're doing with her and he has to know where she's at at any given time. As soon as he woke up from his nap today.... he was scouting through the house with his hands up.... looking for his sister.

When she cries- he is very attentive.... trying to pat her face or give her hugs as to make her happy & quiet again.

He loves to sit right next to her and in fact, when she rests in the swing.... he pulls his chair right over to her so that he can see her & his cartoons at the same time. We're working on helping him to be a little more gentle with her when he touches her face & gives her hugs.... but otherwise- so far, so good, & so much better than what we expected.

Clover has been incredible. Not a single complaint. She is sleeping most of the time.... she wakes up to eat, she looks around the room & studies everything, and then she drifts off to sleep again.

It's way too soon to be making any assumptions but it seems that we may have another perfect little baby on our hands. It's hard to imagine that God would bless us with two very happy babies.... but He's done more miraculous things.

We are so happy and feel so blessed. Today has been wonderful. We've gotten the laundry done, played with Carter, enjoyed company from Grandma & Grandpa Dick and Aunt Maddie,
and everything has gone much better than I would have ever guessed. We could not possibly ask for more..... even found time to mop the floors.

If you'd like to come and visit.... we are welcoming visitors. Please just call and let us know what time you may be by as we do have a few errands to run tomorrow morning.

Thank you for all of your thoughts & prayers as we've made this transition from a family of 3 to family of 4.

If every day goes like today has..... we will be the luckiest little family on earth.

looking more and more like her bubba....

2010-07-30T16:58:00.000-07:00

Clover @ just shy of 19 hours old.... and mama believes that she's looking more and more like Carterbug.... which is not such a bad thing at all. :)

We'll be leaving the hospital this evening to take her home. We're praying for a smooth transistion for the 4 of us.... and a healthy & positive adjustment for Carterbug. He seems to really be interested in her so far. Last night we asked him several times where his baby was and he pointed right to her.... even leaned in for a few *quick* little kisses.

We're a bit more tired than usual but otherwise.... the happiest we've ever been. We're so excited to see what the future holds for our little family of four.

Thanks for checking in.... more pictures & updates to come over the coming days....

11 hours old.

2010-07-30T08:45:00.000-07:00

Introducing: Miss Clover Rylie

2010-07-30T01:14:00.000-07:00

[ our beautiful little girl . less than one minute old ]

Dear Carterbug

2010-07-28T04:12:00.001-07:00

My precious little man,

So, as the doctor would say, you are still a baby. Until we get to your second birthday is what he said and I am oh so glad because I love calling you my baby and knowing that it is actually politically correct despite the fact that you are turning into a little boy right before our eyes. You will always be my baby..... not just until you're two but until you are one hundred and two.... for as long as you live..... and I imagine, that when the two of us meet in heaven, I will call you my baby even then.

You are SO beautiful. So beautiful that it takes my breath away. I watch you wonder at all the things around you and explore what this great big world has to offer and you do it with such amazement that what I see just reaches in and tugs so hard at my heart. I very clearly remember what it was like seeing you for the first time. I was in awe. Totally and utterly amazed that beautiful little you had been growing inside of my belly all that time and I had not a hint of just how incredibly precious and beautiful you were. All the dreams and the daydreams and the pictures that I had in my mind of how you would look and the little facial expressions you would make.... nothing compared to what I saw when you were here. It must have been the most awe-inspiring moment of my entire life.

And since then..... watching you grow has been much the same and I'll admit, at times, it's been a bit heartbreaking as well. My sweet, innocent, little baby boy is growing. When you toddle away from me sometimes.... it stings to watch and I can't help but think about all the heartbreak in life you have yet to experience. But the wonderful thing about this heartbreak that we experience is that growing into the individuals that God intends for us to become is nothing short of a miracle. He puts the most incredible obstacles scattered throughout the way for us.... but with each one that we overcome.... we're that much more knowledgeable, that much more prepared for what lies ahead, and that much closer to fulfilling that incredible purpose that we are created for.

Carter. I can't begin to imagine what God has designed you for. You, my amazing son, are going to accomplish the most incredible things. You have so much joy and optimism in your personality.... it's so plain to see at this young age of yours. You are FULL of beauty and joy. Even when you're throwing yourself backwards because mama won't let you perch upon the table and smack the ceiling light.... I can still see the sparkle in your eyes. You don't disappoint me one bit in anything that you do for it seems that right now, you do everything with such good and innocent intentions. I pray that this innocence never leaves you and that you always set out to accomplish great things regardless of what lies in the way.

It's as if I pray for these things and then I wonder why I bother praying because I already know that God has intended you for a purpose so great that I couldn't even fathom something so perfect to pray for. That's the incredible thing about having God as our father. We can ask for all that we think is good but He always seems to come through with something so much greater than what we've asked for. And when our prayers come unanswered..... which they often do..... it's not long before we're able to look back and see just why they were swept away.

If I could teach you only one thing in this life that you would hold on to and remember every step of the way.... it would be to TRUST GOD. In the hard, bitter, heart-wrenching circumstances that seem to be beyond any ounce of understanding..... to the incredible once-in-a-lifetime experiences that we have so many of thanks to His love for us. There are two things I can tell you for certain Carter. God will always be here for you and mama will always be here for you. If the whole rest of the world seems against you and you feel lonely and dim..... I will be just a call away and God will be right there at your side. And in the times in your life that mama is gone.... that I've moved to heaven and you are not able to pick up the phone and call.... my love will still be there and if God will allow it.... my spirit will be as well. I will never stop loving & supporting you with everything in me. never.

Big important things for such a little boy to understand, I know. But.... the glory of the big stuff in these letters is that I intend them to be for your reading.... which means that you'll be much older of course when you read & are able to appreciate their content.

So- you're a big brother to a chubby little baby in mama's belly..... the little girl with the bedroom down the hallway. And today or tomorrow- we get to meet her. What will you ever do when I go to get you out of bed in the morning and you can't lift up my shirt and slap your hands on my big round belly? I'm sure that these next couple of weeks will be nothing short of confusing for you and I think that this must be the first big obstacle in your little life. But.... we'll get through it together. Daddy & I can't wait to have the both of you around and we have no greater desire than to welcome your sister into our little family as easily and happily as possible. People often make comments to me about how they think you will react and I'm surprised at how negative even strangers can seem about what your reaction to her will be.... especially seeing as they don't know the beautiful spirit that you have. I'm confident that despite the confusion and concern you are bound to exhibit in these first couple of weeks.... you'll be a fine big brother, if not the best. If you teach your sister to be anything like you- we are all in such good shape and she won't be destined for anything less than amazing.

I can't wait to introduce you to her. I hope that my anticipation of a rocky start is all just hogwash and that her easement into our little family is as smooth as can be.... but I'm only trying to be realistic and prepared for anything.

Well.... you're sleeping soundly in your crib and mama must shower before you wake up. I can't wait to see you.... my favorite part of the day is waking you up, whether it be from your night's sleep or just a nap. You are always so happy & affectionate. The moment I walk into your room and you hear the door..... you are up and smiling.... pointing at the radio so that mama will turn it on and dance with you or pointing at your books so that we'll sit down and read. Sometimes.... before I can even get the radio going- you are already pointing at the bookrack and then we end up looking at pictures in the books while we listen to the music. Whatever makes you happy......

Love you little man. This is mama's last letter to you before your sister comes.... very exciting, I know. :) Lots more letters to come in the months and years ahead.... and I can't wait to tell you all about how much you love her once she is here with us. I know I've said it a few times in your letters already.... but you are going to be an awesome big brother.

I LOVE you all the way to the moon and back...... Love, Mama.

Dear Miss C

2010-07-26T10:06:00.000-07:00

[you and me.... 40 weeks + 1 day]

July 28th, 2010 . Day before scheduled induction #2:

Hi sweet baby girl.....

As I type- your busy pushing around in my belly, which is just fine with me really.... even though your Daddy & I along with everyone else believed that you would be 6 days old today.

It's okay that you didn't come following 11 hours of supposed pitocin induction on Thursday because the past 6 days have been enjoyable for us and I'm happy to have had this extra time to carry you. It's much easier for mama to take care of you while you're in my belly. No worries about diapers or feedings or sleepless nights. You're perfectly well and happy in there and I don't hear any complaining.

You don't seem to be in any hurry to meet us.... and after all the jumping and smacking that Carter entertains you with..... I certainly cannot blame you for wanting to stay put. He is forever hammering both of his hands onto mama's belly with all his might and when I ask him to be nice to his sister.... he pets my belly & gives you hugs and kisses. I don't think that he or you for that matter, have a clue what awaits you both in these next several days. He is likely to try and smother you, hit you in the head with his bat, pull you out of your swing or your chair by the feet, and try & shove goldfish into your mouth. I'm sure that he'll be very curious about you and will probably assume you are more of a new toy than a family member. You are likely to keep him up at night, make him cry during the day, take attention away from him, and keep mama nice and sleepy so that she doesn't do quite as much running with him as usual.

Exciting days & weeks are ahead.... there's no doubt, but I have truly prepared myself for the absolute worst of scenarios so I can't imagine that it'll be so bad. Busy, I'm sure.... but never bad. You are both so fortunate to have so many loving and supportive family members that will be close by to help our little family of 4 make this big adjustment.

Thank you for hanging in there with mama for these last 10 months. I've so enjoyed my pregnancy with you. It's been a whirlwind and it's very difficult for me to fathom that I'll be meeting you in just a few days, if not today, in fact..... time has just absolutely flown by like never before. Being pregnant with a girl has been a roller coaster. Extra female hormones in my body have turned me into a 'real' woman.... something which I had never really experienced until you. Hormones have never had an effect on me until these past 10 months.... and although I have so enjoyed carrying you.... a part of me does look forward to feeling 'normal' again. A friend of mine has assured me that she was mad as ever during her entire pregnancy with her little girl.... and as soon as her little girl was here.... she was back to her old self within just a few days. That will be nice for me & for daddy. Extra estrogen causes me to be more impatient than ever, more demanding, more emotional, and more irritable. I've never been quite like this before.... I remember a much more calm & collected me....

With that being said though, this pregnancy with you has been a true joy. You've been such a sweet, quiet, and virtually lazy little thing. You tend to sleep the majority of the time and you haven't caused much discomfort other than just in the past week or so. The beginning of this pregnancy with you commenced with some nausea and bouts of dizziness but was otherwise symptom-less..... and since then, things have been wonderful and I haven't one complaint other than the abundance of female hormones.

Your nursery has been exciting to put together and your closet is (almost insanely) overflowing with pink. Shopping for a girl has been a different experience but so much fun as there are just gobs of beautiful little accessories that I don't have the pleasure of purchasing for your brother. (although he does look quite adorable in your little hairbows but don't tell daddy)

Today has been a very quiet day. Carter has been very independent today... spending much of his time trotting around the house pushing his little toys around & building things with his blocks. He's laying down for a nap just now and mama is planning to take a shower and get quite a bit of laundry done. I am relishing in this quiet time and even though we're very excited to meet you.... I keep reminding myself that doing things like taking showers & folding laundry may not seem quite so easy in just a couple days time.

I am so excited to be your mama. I am so thrilled to see your Daddy hold you and to see Carter poke at you. I am so excited that God has created you just for us. You are a miracle, sweet girl.... and we are incredibly blessed to have you in our lives. I am incredibly fortunate to have had this opportunity to carry you.... and though it's been just a bit longer than expected, I'm perfectly happy about that because being a mother is all about uncertainty. It's about having your heart swell up with so much love that you can hardly breathe and it's also, somedays, about having your heart broken. I feel so honored that God trusts that you'll be safe with us. I can't wait to get to heaven and wrap my arms around Him as tight as possible and thank Him for giving us you. Carter has been a tremendous blessing from the moment he was conceived.... far more blessings have come from having him in our lives than we could have ever imagined and I have no doubt that we'll have the same amazing experience with you. The two of you make life worth living for daddy & I.... there is nothing greater than knowing that we have so many wonderful things to look forward to in life with the both of you in our arms and at our sides.

Starting tomorrow..... or perhaps even tonight.... we will begin helping you write the story of your one & only life.... and my only hope as your mama is that we can help you write one of the greatest stories ever told.

I love you c-girl. I can't wait to hold you in my arms tomorrow. Love, Mama

Update: 39 week appointment

2010-07-13T10:38:00.000-07:00

Though I'm not technically 39 weeks until Thursday.... we had an appointment yesterday to see where things stand.

This is the info from last week's appointment:

gained 2 pounds

blood pressure was wonderful

baby's heartrate was 135

dilated to 1

50% effaced

This is the info from yesterday's appointment: (5 days later)

lost 2 pounds

blood pressure is wonderful

baby's heartrate was 158

dilated to 2

70% effaced

so.... progression is good. but no baby yet. I'll be 39 weeks on Thursday. Doc offered to do an induction & I turned him down. I'd really like to avoid pitocin this time around if at all possible. That stuff was horrendous with Carter.

I found out today that I'm "at risk" for a precipitous labor, meaning a labor lasting less than 3 hours. seriously? what's the RISK? I have to ask myself- is this really a bad thing?

After laboring for 29 hours with Carter.... 3 hours sounds good to me!

38 weeks + 4 days

2010-07-12T05:36:00.000-07:00

last week: taken by me on Thursday (love that Zach is wearing grandpa Bert's shirt here)

Exhausted but not really exhausted.

that doesn't make a bit of sense to you, I know.... but it completely describes how I feel. I think it's as if I'm completely wiped out from the last 2 days at work... but I know that this baby is coming soon & so I want to enjoy all the bits of time with Carterbug that I can before she joins us.

I walked 18 holes at the golf course on Friday, worked 13 hours on Saturday, worked 12.5 hours yesterday..... and then stayed up until 2am organizing and cleaning our master bathroom. It's really no surprise that I'm wiped out.

The past 3 weeks have been a whirlwind, particularly the past week in general.

On Thursday I found myself in this mess:

38 weeks pregnant.

with a broken foot adorned with a big black knee-high velcro boot.

with poison ivy... some which is healing well.... some which is not.... all over my body.

with with a sunburn from Tuesday's day at the golf tournament.

and with a clear memory of what it was like waking up Tuesday morning to discover that I had pink eye.

pink eye, poison ivy, broken foot, sunburn, and 2 weeks from having a baby.

I have never seen a doctor look at a patient quite like the E.R. doc looked at me on Tuesday when he walked into the room. He glanced down at my boot, noticed my big belly, looked at the open blisters from the poison ivy on my arm, and then looked at my right eye that was red as ever & draining. I love that he most simply said, "Well.... which.... what..... exactly am I seeing you for?"

He couldn't give me steroids for the poison ivy because of my broken foot and he couldn't give me medication for the pink eye because it was most likely (75% chance) viral. I asked about him breaking my water.... and he laughed.

I moped about my ailments, I will admit.... until it came to me on Friday that this is God's very way of reassuring me that I can certainly handle 2 babies. honestly. I believe that is exactly what that was all about.

The past couple of weeks... the reality of having another newborn has struck me suddenly. Nervousness & anxiety have not been far from reach and I've found myself in tears once or twice holding Carter or just conversing with Zach. I've not experienced mothering 2 children before but despite my lack of experience.... I am aware that there is this deep dark fear in all 2nd time mommies that the love for the new baby will just not be quite like the love for the first one.

I admitted to Marci (our photographer) during our maternity session 2 weeks ago that I was terrified and she assured me that this is totally normal hormonal behavior for a mama who is about to have a baby & a toddler in the same house. So it turns out that I'm just normal. Or well.... at least I have normal feelings sometimes.

So- doctor's appointment this afternoon. I'll be 39 weeks on Thursday so technically this is my 39 week appointment I suppose. I very seriously doubt that he will tell me I've dilated any further. Last week I was just the same as the week before.... 1 centimeter.

Have you seen a ruler lately?

A baby's head cannot possible fit through a hole that is 1 cm so that means that I'm not anywhere near ready to actually deliver a baby. The good news is that there was this one time.... I went from 1 cm to 10 cm in the very span of 27 (agonizing) hours.... and then it ONLY took 2 HOURS and 45 MINUTES to get the baby out of the 10 cm opening.

so no big deal right?

She is due to come on next Thursday and despite the doc's pleas to allow him to induce me next Thursday.... I think I will pass on the offer and see what happens. I hated being induced. It was definitely worse than any dentist appointment I've ever had and that is saying a lot because I loathe the dentist.

It just so happens that Carterbug is napping.... and I have to get a shower in before the appointment this afternoon so.... I'm out of here for now but I'll update shortly if there is any progress. :)

Thanks for checking in!, Jamie

Dear Carter . Month 16

2010-06-21T18:10:00.000-07:00

Carterbug.

It's been a couple of months since I have written. You see.... when I started your monthly letters- I fully intended to write one every month & I even went as far as to think that it was possible to write them all on the 19th.

Well. that didn't work out. And when you're a grown up & you have a crazy baby like I do- you will understand.

You went through a phase there of about 3 months where you didn't do much that was new & exciting. You were just the same kid.... doing the same things.... still pooping your pants, still eating with your hands, still beating on the cats, and still enjoying things like Mickey Mouse & walks outside. I wasn't sure that if I sat down to write you a letter- I would have anything interesting to say about you or about us for that matter. Life was moving quickly and not much was changing.

so things have changed.

You're doing new things every single day. I can hardly keep track to be totally honest. You've experienced so many firsts in the past few weeks that I keep vowing to sit down by the end of the day & write some of it down and then I get so distracted & exhausted that I end up calling it a night way earlier than usual.

Let's see..... where do I begin with the new stuff? You point at everything. You've been pointing at things for awhile but lately- it's been a bit insane. It's as if you don't feel whole unless one or both of your hands is poked straight out from your body and your index fingers and aiming at something. anything. you will point at things for no reason.

it's actually come in handy lately though because you refuse to talk. the other day- you pulled me to the refrigerator and pointed at the water dispenser. When I put water into your sippy cup- you clapped your hands, grabbed the cup, and took off.

at least you're a boy who knows what he wants. i like that.

You're giving lots of kisses, hugs, and "snuggles". Mama asks you for snuggles and you come straight to me (80% of the time) and lay your head on my shoulder and pet my face like I'm the cat. You're so sweet and your little laugh is infectious.... even when it's the fake nervous laugh.

You love Mickey Mouse & you've done your best to fit him into your daily routine. As soon as I sit you down on the floor out of your crib- we read a book together & then you head for the living room where you grab your toy story chair, pull it out to the middle of the floor, and then hand mama the remote so that I'll start your first Mickey episode for the day. We try to limit you to 2 episodes a day but let's face it.... sometimes you have horrible days and you get to watch 3 episodes because we are so far behind on laundry.

You adore the outdoors. You love to play with the water hose, splash in your pirate water table, run in the yard, carry the cat around the patio by her neck, walk down to the driving range with your daddy, and go for rides in your stroller & your wagon through the neighborhood. You really enjoy going for rides to nana & papa's and then hanging out with them. Nana always gives you something good to eat while we're there..... your current favorites are strawberries, bananas, grapes, & raspberries. Nana & Papa are always stocked up on bananas and strawberries & every time they come home from the grocery store- they stop by our house to bring you some so that you don't ever run out at home.

Although you don't talk much at all.... you completely understand english and you recognize a lot of words. If we ask you if you want to eat- you head for your highchair. If we ask if you want to take a bath- you go straight for the tub. We ask you to bring us different things all the time and you happily go get them as you're really good at knowing exactly what we're asking for. In the afternoons.... when daddy pulls into the driveway- I'll tell you that I think I might hear daddy and you run as fast as you can to the garage door.

Just recently- you started getting really fascinated with the potty and potty-related things in general. Every time you pee your pants- you come to us and grab onto your diaper. Sometimes you'll even run to your changing area where the clean diapers are and you'll lay down & put your feet up so that we'll change you. So.... daddy and I ordered you your first set of big boy underwear tonight & we're buying you your very own potty chair this week. we'll see how it goes..... we certainly don't expect you to be using toilet paper by next week but it'll be nice to introduce you to the idea of going somewhere other than your pants.

I must have not gotten to you as quickly as you would have liked the other morning because when I went to get you out of your crib- you had already taken off your diaper and thrown it into the floor. not necessarily a good thing but I can't blame you. i wouldn't want to have a pee-filled diaper on me either.

the not-so-good new things you're doing: well there are some.

You're testing boundaries with us big time, particularly in the last 2 weeks. You threw your first actual fit last weekend when I wouldn't let you climb on top of the kitchen table. Since then- there have been a few more.... but they're very short lived. You plop down on the floor and kick your feet back & forth and let out an atrocious whine. it's nothing we can't handle. Actually- sometimes, I hate to admit, it is just a little funny.

You've also started hitting. That's the newest & most aggrivating thing. I know it's normal.... I've read the books.... but still, it's so frustrating. You're such a sweet boy to be hitting. And you don't have a care in the world when it comes to what you are hitting. You'll hit mama, dada, the cat, the floor, your highchair.... whatever is closest to you when you get mad about something. You smacked mama the other day & I immediately told you 'no' and sat you down on the floor and walked away. You were heartbroken. You cried & cried, followed me around the house, and when I finally picked you up & asked you to tell me you were sorry- you laid your head on my shoulder for a good 2 minutes. It was awful.

You obviously know that what you're doing is wrong because you show signs of regret but you're proving that you are just a little bit out of self-control in the heat of the moment. I assume that this is typical for a boy your age or a girl for that matter.

You'll learn.... I suspect that you'll be back to your sweet little self in about 16 more months.

Mama is nine months pregnant this week. Which means so many things but most importantly, where you are concerned, this could mean that this may be your last monthly letter without a little sister in our midst.

I am mostly carefree & optimistic about this whole 2 baby situation.... but I would be lying to you & to myself if I didn't tell you that sometimes I worry myself sick over the change that we're about to experience as a family. good change of course.... because we are already head over heels in love with the idea of having a little girl around.... but still change, nonetheless.

It's scary thinking that you and I will spend our days with some other little creature around. How do I hold 2 babies while we watch Mickey Mouse? Will you & I still cut up pickles & share them in the afternoons screaming & laughing as much as want to while we gobble them up & make a big mess? Of course we will. That's what I say. No matter what.... we will still have pickles.

We will still have 'us'.

You are my firstborn Carterbug..... you always will be and I will always love you with every ounce of me. You will always be the little boy who introduced daddy & I to a whole new life together. Our love is a million times what it once was because we share it with you. Our lives completely revolve around you & what it means to have a strong, healthy family. Your little sister will add so much to our little family and the four of us will experience so many wonderful things in life together.

I anticipate rough days & overwhelming moments. I know that having 2 babies is a lot different than having one. But.... I am so thankful, so joyful, and so stinking excited that the two of you are going to be so close in age. I wouldn't have it any other way. I can't wait until she gets old enough to play with you & the two of you become the best of friends.

I know you. Your heart is huge. You're going to be an amazing big brother, an amazing protector, and you'll always have her best interests at heart. I thank God every day that we had you before her because she'll need you and you'll be there. You are going to be awesome when it comes to loving your sister. There are no doubts. The two of you will have an incredible relationship for years and years to come and daddy & I will be so proud to be your parents.

We already are.

SO PROUD. So in love. So amazed. So overwhelmed with emotion. So intrigued at your every move. We are feeling more blessed these days than ever and we feel so incredibly LUCKY to have you in our lives.

Seriously.... just look at yourself. What did we ever do to deserve such an awesome little boy!?

You're adorable, snuggly, smiley, and your little personality grows more and more admirable everyday. We're watching you grow from a beautiful little baby into a beautiful little boy so quickly..... and there is no doubt that God is working on wondrous & prosperous plans for your future. I feel as if I'm in the presence of angels when you're in my arms. There is something so very special about you Carterbug.

Thank you for being so awesome. We LOVE you with every bit of us. Keep growing the way you have been & we'll all continue to just marvel at the incredible little creature you are.

Love you so much baby boy......

xoxoxoxoxoxoxxo~ mama

new computer = new post

2010-06-11T08:18:00.001-07:00

so we finally got rid of the dinosaur.

thank you Jesus.

so here comes a boring blog post because I've been up since 5:45 am scrubbing the house and trying to keep up with Carterbug & I'm absolutely about to faint from exhaustion.

things are good here. hanging out as much as possible & trying to get prepared for Miss C to make her debut, which amazingly is only 5-6 weeks away. time is flying.

she's finally a mover & a shaker just like her brother. I knew that I was experiencing the calm before the storm earlier on in the pregnancy. Now she's crazy in there, moving all over the place & it seems as if she weighs at least 10 pounds, although realistically- she is closer to 5.

after this week- I'm down to just 2 days a week as far as working goes & I'm thrilled about that. I desperately need that one extra day of quality time with Carter & Zach before the baby is here.

We're working on the nursery.... it's coming together really nicely but still needs quite a bit done. anyone feel like sanding some furniture? We have an antique chest in the garage dying to be sanded, painted, & carried inside to get a hardware makeover.

Zach is golfing nearly everyday... providing that it's not raining.... & Carter and I have been fortunate enough to push along in the stroller right behind him. It's been such a fun start to the summer. Hopefully we'll be able to invest in a double stroller before too long & both babies will cooperate well while we watch daddy play golf in the afternoons.

He has a tournament coming up in 10 or so days.... so please keep him in your prayers. I know that he'll do well.

Carter had his 15 month check-up yesterday. perfect as can be. 95th percentile in height & 74th in weight. The doc didn't have any concerns.

He doesn't have any interest in talking. He definitely communicates well & he knows what everything is. We can ask him to throw something away or pick up his toys ..... or if he wants to go outside or take a bath.... and he knows exactly what we're talking about. He's also very good at grabbing ahold of us & pointing to things that he wants (i.e. the pantry if he's hungry). But- he has no interest in talking.

The doctor wasn't concerned at all & actually commented on how wonderful he believed that Carter's personality was for his age. He went on & on about what a comedian he was as he was cracking us all up in the office.

So- no worries. healthy baby.

And today has been rough might I mention, thanks to the shots at the appointment. He keeps pointing to the bandaids on his leg & whining at me..... he knows exactly what to do to get some cuddles & kisses. Those shots this time around were traumatizing. He cried all the way home, frantically lifting his shorts up & pointing at his bandaids everytime we glanced at him in the backseat. it was pathetic & adorable at the same time.

so now that the new computer is up & running..... I shouldn't have any issues with keeping everyone updated & adding new pictures here & there. It's amazing what a new computer does for a person. I told Zach that I'm leaving him for the iMac. I love it to pieces & I think that the feeling is mutual. It does everything I tell it to do.

2 posts in 1 day... is it a record?

2010-05-03T20:02:00.001-07:00

wanted to share these pictures from this afternoon.... my two favorite boys hanging out on the tractor. definitely one of my favorite pictures of my little man with his 'dada'. oh... they are just gorgeous.

.... and no, you can't eat them up. I already tried.

.

for Danita....

2010-05-03T09:11:00.001-07:00

This post is just for you Danita.... because this morning while I was making my coffee (shame, I know) I thought of you and how you might be getting on the blog soon dissapointed to find that the picture of Carter in the toilet is still at the top of the page...... and that no new blog posts have shown up.....

Unfortunately, I don't have a ton of new pictures to share. I'm on strike from messing with pictures until my husband lets me get that new computer. not really.... but Zach, if you read this, we would have more beautiful pictures of our children if I had the new iMac.... and mother's day is THIS weekend, hint.

So.... Carter is tucked into bed for his nap.... he's so stinkin' cute, I can't get over it. Whenever he's ready for nap time- he comes to me with both hands straight up over his head signing for 'milk'.... thank goodness for sign language because he absolutely refuses to say anything other than 'dada' or 'nana' these days..... and he also likes to mimic the cats (which sounds nothing like an actual cat but more like a monkey, a high pitched 'ah,ah,ah').

I totally just answered my cell phone and said, "oncology, this is Jamie".... tells you what kind of day I'm having.... good thing it was my husband and not someone important like.... well noone actually calls me that would be suprised to hear that greeting I guess.....

anyway... back to Carter. He's tucked into bed for his nap. Except that he's not tucked into his actual crib because he somehow managed to dive headfirst out of it last Friday afternoon. So now he sleeps in his portable crib in the middle of his room because he's not quite tall enough to climb out of it. that we know of.

We're at a total loss as to what to do. His height is that of an average 2 1/2 year old and I'm really starting to wonder if he might have, somewhere along the line, gorillas in his ancestry because his climbing skills are out of this world.

His mattress is set on the lowest level by the way.... and so I suggested to Zach that we go, right now this minute, to buy a video monitor for his room.... to which, he very intelligently responded- "Why.... so that we will be able to watch him climb out of the crib and fall into the floor?" because seriously. We both know that he's faster than lightning (remember the toilet story).

So I think the result of that conversation is that we will keep him in his portable crib until someday, in all of our free time, we will take the base out of his crib and put his mattress directly on the floor.... making it more of a cage, than a crib. Maybe the monkey in him will appreciate that.

Back to his nap.

He's taking a nap while sporting the most adorable (and pitiful) black eye I've ever seen. Apparently yesterday while daddy was in charge and mama was busy making a living..... Carter decided that he would do fancy acrobats off of the sofa & he face planted, very graciously, on his toy phone. and then, instead of actually calling me to explain.... I get a picture mail on my cell phone with my bruised baby and a message that says "poor Carter... I feel so bad." Needless to say- a phone call followed & then a quiet explanation. Would you know that he (Zach) conveniently dropped Carter off with Nana & Papa about 20 minutes before I got off of work?

He said that it was because he needed to go get some fertilizer.... I knew it was actually because he didn't want to be there when I saw my poor little man's face in person. It wasn't as bad as I anticipated and I think he looks like a real boy for the first time.

but.... I did go ahead and postpone his well baby check-up for one week. I'm not showing up at the pediatrician's office with a pregnant belly, starbucks in one hand & a black-eyed baby on my hip.... I might as well just dial cps & hand them the phone.

We had an ultrasound last Friday and our little girl is still a little girl. I think she's adorable & her daddy thinks she looks like an alien. Either way... the ultrasound tech said that she looks a lot like Carter and I trust her because she actually knows what she's looking at.

She weighs in at a whopping 2 pounds, 6 ounces.... and she has very chubby little cheeks. What else can I tell you? She likes to stick her tongue out & move it around, she is very calm, she is measuring one week behind exactly, and she is breech.

The ultrasound tech told me that the breech thing was no big deal after I insisted that they needed to flip her right then & there. She said that the baby has plenty of room still to flip over and the doc will probably do another scan in 6 or so weeks to check on her position. Honestly... I think she might have flipped last night because she was moving in completely weird ways and I felt like I was sure to throw up so I just went straight to bed. Today.... I'm feeling her in weird places.... so maybe if she didn't flip, she at least got into a new position.

I'm determined to paint her room this week. We had Carter's nursery completely ready to go at 23 weeks.... and hers isn't even started. We have nearly everything we need but just haven't put it together yet. This whole pregnancy- I've had every intention of painting her room a light green & last week, I had a sudden freak-out moment & painted a big blob of pink on the wall.... and then acted like a total nutcase & cried real tears to Zach because I "just don't know what to do with the curtains if I paint the wall pink!"

hormones!

..... and I still haven't figured out the pink vs. green debate.

well.... here I was, just a few minutes ago, yacking at Zach about how much I had to do around here before C woke up & while I'm glad I could share an update of our lives with you all..... there is still a trail of toilet paper from our master bedroom to the living room..... and my prenatal vitamin bottle is back in the shower again along with a box of q-tips and a toy story bandaid box.

I'm not joking. I'm serious. I couldn't make this stuff up if I tried.

speaking of the shower.... here's a picture of Carter taking a shower to keep you happy until the next post.....

this is real life.

2010-04-21T11:40:00.001-07:00

I'm sitting here at the computer.

An 11 year old laptop that is grease stained from my husband work hands. It's missing 3 keys. 2 keys (the s & the d) don't work unless you hit them 3 or four times. And the stupid thing shuts off unexpectedly, with no notice, at least twice a day. I've been drooling over the apple website for the past 3 weeks, practically begging my frugal husband for a new computer but he absolutely refuses to finance anything and he believes that credit cards are a creation of Satan.

The computer is in the floor because we have no computer desk. I went to Pier One yesterday looking for one but the only one that I could find that I liked wasn't in stock.... and because I'm usually an impulse shopper & had a moment to think about ordering it.... I very quickly decided that putting $300 into a computer desk for an 11 year old laptop was a ridiculous idea when I could be putting that money towards saving for a new computer.

SAVING is not a word in my vocabulary. If it doesn't come out of my paycheck and go directly into a savings account.... I don't know what saving means. I know.... it's cold, hard, honesty and I'm sad to admit it but also very happy to be totally honest with you and with myself.

So anyway..... I'm sitting in the floor at my dinosaur of a computer with my 8 month pregnant belly hanging over my jeans.... while my son, who is STILL in his pajama top, is busy tearing apart my bridal bouquet on the other side of the bedroom. The bridal bouquet came from the top of the nightstand because the vase that it usually hangs on the wall in hasn't been hung up yet.... and we've lived here for 6 MONTHS. come to mention it.... there isn't anything hanging from our bedroom walls except for the crooked curtain rods that my husband was supposed to straighten out 2 or 3 weeks ago.... or was that months ago??....

I haven't showered today. (did I shower yesterday?)

My hair is.... well.... God only knows what kind of mess it's in because I haven't even so much as glanced in the mirror today. I do have my glasses on, which desperately need to be cleaned because everywhere I look I see a spot in the lower right hand corner. I have on yesterday's left over make-up. Seriously.... I'm completely aware that it "adds 7 days to your age EVERYTIME you go to bed with makeup on" because my mom did the whole Mary Kay saleswoman thing for a few years..... about 8 years ago..... and if it tells you anything about how often I use old Mary's facewash..... I'm still using the same bottle that she bought me way back then.

And so I just noticed that Carter's hands are dripping wet. Why? probably because he's super-quick at running from place to place and I totally forgot to shut the door to the toilet earlier and he's managed to run as fast as he can to the toilet & back.... but not without sticking his hands in it in between.

The bed is unmade. of course. I remember a conversation that Zach & I had shortly after we got married..... when he questioned my making the bed everyday. He insisted that we were just going to sleep in it at night and then I insisted that the house wasn't clean unless the bed was made. What I didn't know then, that I definitely know now.... is that I made the bed everyday because I DIDN'T HAVE A TODDLER.

If you would have told me then that there would be a day when making the bed seemed like something you did when company was coming but never otherwise..... I would probably have said something along the lines of.... "Oh... NOT ME.... I'll never be like that".

It's just not a normal day around here if the bed is made & Carter has managed to stay out of the toilet.

The dishes are done & the laundry is dry, but not folded..... and there are 8 or 9 new pictures on the camera that I managed to take earlier but I couldn't tell you what they are of as I have forgotten what was happening at 8 o'clock this morning because I have pregnancy brain.

What I do remember clearly about today is that I was talking to Zach when he called on his lunch break and I threw a small fit about what I hadn't gotten done.... to which he very kindly replied.... "You just need to work on your time management skills."

no kidding.

There is a new batch of fabric sitting on the table that I just pulled out of the mailbox a little while ago that I fully intend on making a take home outfit for the baby with.... and would you know that I have never made anything with fabric that someone actually wears in my life?

Carter is bouncing up & down on my butt (which is at least 3 inches larger than it was 8 months ago because that's where all of my pregnancy weight has gone) and I'm trying to convince him that he should go answer the Mickey Mouse phone that is ringing in the corner because my pelvis hurts and his poor baby sister is being squashed all over the place.

It's 3:05 which means that I have exactly 1 hour to race around here, pick up all the stray toys, blocks, books, & bottles.... jump into the shower & put makeup on my face, put Carter into some real clothes, and maybe even lay some meat out on the counter for dinner before Zach comes home.

I can't help but think to myself that I have been going all day long and still it seems that nothing has gotten done.... and I know that this is the true definition of MOTHER.

What I can feel good about, and do feel good about..... is that my friend (I'll withold her name just incase she's ever told her cousin to read my blog) told me today that her cousin puts Pepsi in her kid's sippy cups!

I do NOT put pepsi in Carter's sippy cups and that is something to feel good about right?

He may play in the toilet every once in awhile and still be wearing his pajamas in the afternoon but his sippy cup has water in it folks!

And so today.... I can be grateful for that.

As far as I'm concerned..... when Zach comes home and has a look at my hair, Carter's pajama top, and our unmade bed.... and asks what on earth I have been doing all day..... I can tell him that I've been saving money on our dentist bills.

Now.... I have to go because my kid is wrapped up in a strand of pearls that he pulled off the Christmas tree & hid in his toy box and he's sitting right in the middle of our shower with a container of shaving cream and a bottle of prenatal vitamins.

squeaky clean

2010-04-21T09:41:00.000-07:00

Carterbug loves bathtime. Just this week.... he has started going into his bathroom & pointing into the bathtub to let me know that he wants to take a bath. I love that he wants to be clean but sometimes bathtime will last over an hour before he decides that he's finished.

He seems to be doing so many new things lately.... that I can hardly keep up with him. He's getting sweeter & smarter by the day & is so full of energy anymore. He LOVES to play outside & he's really into his books. He's also figured out that mommy has a bigger belly than normal. He often pulls up my shirt & pokes at my belly button.

He has NO clue that he's going to be a big brother. I try & explain to him that there's a baby in my belly & he just looks at me with puzzled looks & laughs.

12 more weeks until she joins us.... TWELVE. that seems impossible if you ask me.

The third tri-mester officially begins tomorrow.....

thankful....

2010-04-20T07:00:00.001-07:00

Today.... I am most thankful for this lemur mom from the zoo last weekend who so kindly demonstrated exactly what life will look like for me in just three short months..... [click image to enlarge]

.... going shopping today for Carterbug with his nana & papa..... we're sure to come home with some goodies. They LOVE to take him shopping for new things. Looking forward to spending the day with the three of them.... we are so blessed!

Post 160

2010-04-14T10:13:00.000-07:00

This is my 160th blog post. :)

Hence the title. I'm exhausted, have a headache, an earache, and Carter has been sick today too.... so be thankful for the post & don't fuss over the generic-ness of it's title.

Baby C #2 is 26 weeks old today and her doctor's appointment yesterday revealed that she is perfectly healthy and sized just right. We have another ultrasound scheduled for May 5th to check her out again. I'm wondering if she's still breech so we'll find out then.....

Dr. Booth thinks not by the way.... but we'll see who's right. It could just be that I don't ever feel her up high because my placenta is in the way.

Carter is doing so well here lately with the exception of him not feeling well. I'm pretty confident that it has something to do with his 2 new teeth coming in. He's at my ankles every minute & he just wants to snuggle & read books which is alright by me except that we don't have a maid.

Here are a couple of new pictures I took of him just yesterday afternoon while daddy was golfing: pretty cute for being sick huh? look at those little curls.....
he's finally really starting to enjoy the grass..... we can't keep him inside anymore. As soon as we come in at night.... he's no sooner tugging on the door handles wanting to go back out. I'm glad that he seems to be a nature lover like his daddy.
I'm so far behind on his scrapbook so I have to get working on it while he's napping..... hope everyone is doing well & we appreciate you checking in on us. C's 14 month birthday is in 5 more days.... maybe I'll put his birthday letter up with some recent pictures.... stay tuned.

our little bookworm

2010-04-06T08:37:00.001-07:00

Carter LOVES books. He loves to be read to & he loves to just sit alone and look through his books. First thing in the morning.... before I can even get him out of his crib- he is pointing at the book rack on the wall. We must have read every book in that rack at least 100 times (Thank you Easter bunny for the new books).

I'm so thankful that he has a love for reading & I hope it continues! There is nothing better than him snatching up a blankie & a book from his toy box & running over to maneuver himself into my lap so that I'll read it to him. We have reading time several times a day and I'm so happy that we're starting to venture into longer books with more interesting story lines.

My favorites are Dr. Seuss..... his favorites are anything with less than 6 words on a page as his favorite part of reading is getting to turn the pages. But we're getting there. His attention span is getting longer & we've been reading some Bernstein Bears & Disney stories here recently.

Excuse me for my total lack of words today.... pregnancy brain. I'm lacking some creativity.

Some little girl has stolen it all.

Easter post coming soon.... I still have to upload & sort through all the pictures!

learning new things.....

2010-03-31T11:40:00.000-07:00

This is Carterbug (obviously) on Sunday morning. He has started insisting on feeding himself recently & while we want to encourage him to try new things & we realize that practice makes perfect.... we're not really fans of having 20 minute cleanup time + a bath after every meal.

But.... whatever it takes to make him happy & to help him learn......

..... and this is nothing compared to the photo that we took of him eating his dinner last night.....

unfortunately, practice has not made perfect yet.

beginning to feel a little like Martha.....

2010-03-29T10:17:00.001-07:00

Stewart.

but minus the criminal tendencies.

C is napping but after his nap- we plan to run to the grocery for some dinner ingredients.
Today feels like a ham & bean soup day.....

On Friday I made homemade chicken & noodles.... REAL homemade noodles..... the kind you have to actually roll out with a pin (or a baby bottle if you don't have a pin) and then they dry for several hours.

It was tedious but they were worth it.

And after we whip up the ham & bean soup..... I'll be taking on a new challenge this evening after C drifts off to sleep & while Zach plays cards with his friends.

Quilt making.

I'm making Carter a quilt. It looks totally do-able I think. I may change my mind once I get to the actual "quilting part" and besides I think the sewing Gods are trying to tell me something as I have successfully managed to break 3 sewing machines in the past 18 months.

On to sewing machine number 4 and honestly, if I break this one.... I get the point.

If I'm successful at making quilt #1, I've already chosen all of my fabrics for baby quilt #2.... one for our next little family member.

And speaking of her- I'm 24 weeks this week. incredible huh? venturing into the beginning of the 7th month already.

She's 12 inches long and weighs 1.5 pounds. Her brain is developing rapidly and so are her lungs and taste buds. Her face is complete now with well developed features and her hair continues to grow. She is now just a thinner version of what she will be when she is born. If baby were born today.... she would require long term intensive care as babies at this stage struggle with breathing on their own. Hopefully she hangs out with me for another 14 weeks.....

I had full intentions on uploading a very cute picture of Carterbug today but blogger uploader is not cooperating with me. I'll try again on Wednesday. :)

Thanks for checking in......

Our Little Picasso

2010-03-28T10:59:00.001-07:00

The Easter Bunny left some fingerpaints early this year..... and on Friday- Carterbug tried them out for the first time:yum.... good thing they're non-toxic huh?cleaning up.....his artwork on display..... it looks perfect on the refrigerator! After it's reign on the refrigerator.... it will be definitely find it's new home in a frame.

The UPS Man

2010-03-19T10:37:00.001-07:00

He came today and left the most beautiful box of goodies on our front porch.....
All the bedding for the new nursery..... and a beautiful clock for her wall. Carterbug really enjoyed emptying out the box and then sitting inside of it while I oood & ahhd over all of her fancy little things.
Now we just need to finish up her furniture, paint and/or wallpaper her walls.... and put some odds & ends into place.
I'm finding that this girlie stuff is actually quite fun.

Now.... my boy is calling to me from his crib.... he's definitely not wanting to take his nap today.... perhaps it's because he slept nearly 14 hours last night?

love this life.

2010-03-16T10:17:00.001-07:00

Love these two. They are so smitten with eachother. Particularly Carter with "dadadadadada", as he likes to call him....

Love spending the day with my little monster man.
Love that he is so affectionate these days, hugging and kissing on me all the time.
Love that his little sister is starting to move more and more, letting me know that she's hanging out with us too.
Love playing with building blocks and coloring on his mickey mouse table.
Love watching Baby Einstein videos and eating goldfish together.
Love that nana & papa live right down the street and we get to walk down there to see them so often.
Love watching Carter cuddle up to the vaccuum cleaner when I tell him that it's okay.... it won't hurt him.
Love that he looks out the window when I ask him where daddy is.... and that he's always quick to run to the door as soon as he hears daddy's car pull in the garage.
Love that Zach gets home so early from work and we have the whole evening to enjoy together.
Love that my husband is so amazing and he helps me cook dinner, helps me clean the house, helps me take care of Carter, and then always asks if there's anything I need him to do for me.... he is so thoughtful.
Love our afternoon walks together in the neighborhood.
Love our evenings by the fire on the back patio.
Love that we have a creek in our backyard that we venture down to and look at. Carter always points at it as if he's ready for his bath.
Love that Carter uses sign language at night to let us know he's ready to have some milk and go to sleep.
Love that he goes to bed early enough for mommy & daddy to have some time together.

I love this life of ours. We are so blessed.

today....

2010-03-08T18:39:00.001-08:00

today.... we thanked God for another 24 hours.
today.... it was 60 degrees. finally.
today.... we played outside after breakfast.
today.... nana & papa were home from florida after a long 2 months & 1 week.
today.... we went for a walk in the neighborhood with daddy.
today.... we spent time with family.
today.... we skipped making dinner & had Chef Boyardee instead.
..... and today.... we took this picture:

Thank you so much.....

2010-02-28T18:10:00.001-08:00

..... those of you who prayed for us to get pregnant
..... those of you who rejoiced for us when we did
..... those of you who celebrated the birth of our son
..... those of you who followed us & prayed for us throughout this past year
..... those of you who were there yesterday at the best party we've ever been to
..... those of you who were not able to make it but sent your love & birthday wishes
..... and thank you so much to those of you who will continue to be a part of our lives throughout this next year as we greet our newest little family member, carter's sweet & precious little sister.
This past year was incredible. The birthday party yesterday was incredible. And we're certain that we have nothing less than incredible to look forward to in this year to come.

Thank you all so much.

Our Entry..... & Carter's Time Capsule.....The gorgeous little birthday boy himself.....The cake & dessert table:Carter's First Birthday Cake:& some cute little cupcakes to match.....C got his very own little mickey mouse cake..... and it's a good thing he did..... ..... because it turns out that he really likes cake. All of his wonderful first birthday presents!!The birthday boy's long after-party nap......

Thanks again everyone!! Carter had a wonderful birthday party.... & we loved having such great people around to celebrate it with us. We are so incredibly blessed!!

Happy First Birthday sweet Carterbug..... we love you....

..... and the new little one is......

2010-02-22T17:13:00.000-08:00

....... a princess!! We're so excited to announce that Carter will have a little sister!!! Woohoo! We're going to have one of each..... how perfect! We are so blessed!

let's pretend it's January 1st.....

2010-02-16T11:43:00.000-08:00

.... and that it's not to late for my new year's resolution to be:

Keep up with the blog!

Internets,

The terrible thing about my horrible neglect is that just about everyday.... I think to myself something along the lines of: "I need to update the blog now that we have the internet again.... I'm going to regret not documenting all of the great things going on right now... it'll only take a few minutes....."

The problem with that statement is that, let's be realistic... if I devoted "only a few minutes" to a lot of different things (like organizing the master bedroom closet).... I wouldn't be so crazy.

The video plays over & over again in my head.... the kids are older & they're going through the beautiful hardbound book of blog entries from back in the olden days (that would be now).... and one of them says.... "Mom. Where were you from November-February?"

.... and then I'll show them this entry where I get back on track right?

speaking of KIDS. (with an s on the end)

I am pregnant for those of you who didn't already know!

And only in my 18th week.

yes, that's right. almost 5 months. almost half way done. seriously.

actually, if you want to be really technical about things, I am exactly half way done seeing as how I will most likely be induced 1-2 weeks early being is that my son was so enormous.

That cute little fella at the top of the blog entry.... that's my boy. And that little chunky monkey will be a year old this week. Seems way too impossible to believe. I sent out invitations for his birthday party today and it nearly took my breath away, actually placing them in the mailbox.

Is it really possible that 1 year ago on Thursday.... I was on my way to the hospital for induction?

I seriously underestimated how incredible Carter's first year would be...... and how much fun he would add to our lives. He's delightful & sweet. Those are his adjectives. He smiles so much, laughs so much, and gives the best open-mouthed kisses on planet Earth.

Milestones that you've missed since I've been m.i.a? He's walking everywhere.

Carter took his first steps just a few days after he turned 10 months old and he's been getting the hang of things ever since. He walks just about everywhere now and when he crawls, it's only to get to a place where he can pull himself up & start walking.

He also had his first haircut 2 weeks ago.... and he was a real champ. He sat perfectly still while the hairdresser put his little cape on him and he patiently waited for her to just "trim around the edges" because mommy was too paranoid that she would cut too much off.

His 1 year photo session was the same day.... and well, that was an adventure. My perfect little guy had a big temp of 102.6 during his session.... so needless to say, he didn't feel much like laughing and smiling. But still, we managed to get some wonderful pictures of him. of course.

I guess I should talk a little about the new baby:

Well. We don't know whether or not he or she is a he or a she just yet.... 6 more days for that.... and although we're excited to find out, sometimes I wonder if we should since we really could not care any less about the gender. I know Zach would agree that our family would be wonderful if we had another little boy or a little girl..... God has made that decision for us & we're excited to see what He has decided.

This pregnancy has been totally different from my pregnancy with Carter. Some say that this must mean we're having a girl.... I think that's hogwash.

I think that every pregnancy is different and that I'm responding to the hormones a little different this time around.

Cravings & aversions have been totally different. I was nauseaus my entire first tri-mester with this one whereas I never experienced any of that with C. And this one.... he or she is more mellow than C was at this point. I was feeling Carter all the time in my 18th week with him.... this little one is very quiet & only moves around once or twice a day. I'm carrying this one a bit more in my hips than that last one.... and Zach swears that my butt is a little bigger (which I think in guy language is actually a good thing or so it must be because he makes it sound like a good thing). okay. tmi. We'll see what next week's appointment reveals but at my 14 week appointment.... I had gained 3 more pounds with this one than I did with C at that point... no big deal really considering that I ate non-stop my first tri-mester to try and keep the nausea away.

similarities: well.... the heartrates are the same, the docs are the same. Let's hope the deliveries are not the same. God knows that I don't need another ginormous baby with 16" shoulders that requires a vaccuum cleaner to enter the world.

What's going on with the Wolmas? We're still trying to put this new house together. It's taking so much longer than I expected and some rooms still have bare walls. I'm intimidated by our wall space. I have all these gorgeous images that I want to put all over the place.... and no guts to actually frame them and hang them up. It's pathetic. I had the pleasure of taking care of a decorator a few weeks ago who is busy looking for the perfect wall arrangements for me. I look forward to hearing her ideas.

We're drowning in laundry. Whoever says that front-loaders make laundry better lies.

I just wonder what we will ever do when we add another human into the laundry room mix.

I'm busy trying to catch up on a year's worth of scrapbooking/documenting/organizing keepsakes when it comes to C. Trying to keep track of all of his milestones and keep them in a nice little book accompanied by pictures & journaling has been more difficult than I thought it would be.

Zach is driving to work everyday, bless his heart. In the 10 feet of snow we've had. I think he's shoveled our driveway 7 or 8 times.... and gone are the days when he hears me say, "I just love that we have a nice big driveway!"

It's true.... the driveway is nice for company..... horrible for shoveling. Zach is already setting aside his pennies to buy a snow plow for the ATV next year and if I had a quarter for every time he has talked about it.... I'd be so rich I could afford to pay for a heated driveway.

Thanks for catching up with us..... lots of catching up to do. This has been a long entry- my fingers ache.

Hopefully the next one will be really soon.... and much shorter.

xoxo~ Jamie

no internet.

2009-12-08T17:45:00.000-08:00

After a little (a big) tizzy on the phone with At&t expressing much dissatisfaction on our part.... I decided to insist that they cancel our service because it was my wish that we NEVER have a bill from them appear in our mailbox again.

So.... we have no internet for right now.....

Comcast is supposed to be out this week or next to get something set up and we will be back to the internet world.

I wanted to quickly update everyone on C's 9 month appointment. He's 22 pounds and 3 ounces.... this equates to the 75th percentile and I'm quite suprised as he seems to be growing by leaps and bounds here recently. His height is 31 inches.... which is the average height of a 15 month old.... he is off the charts for a 9 month old obviously.

The doctor reported that he is a perfect picture of 9 month old health.... tall & slim with wonderfully cute little cankles.

He sported his diaper and knee high socks throughout the office and was quite the entertainment for the office staff. He cracks us up completely.... growing to be more and more fun & full of excitement with each day. He's the happiest baby we know and have ever seen.... smiling all the time & forever making us all laugh.

He's saying "mama, dada, nana, papa, and baba". He also loves to "scare" people by screaming at them and then he cracks up when they throw their hands up and squeal.

His nightly sleeping patterns are amazing these days.... he goes to sleep between 7 and 8, wakes up once at 3am for a diaper change & small bottle.... and then he drifts back to sleep until 8 or 9 am.

Oh.... how we love him dearly. I don't know what we would ever do without him in our home & our lives.... he makes life so much more fun than we could have ever imagined it to be.

Thanks for checking in~ J.

So.... this is what 9 months looks like!

2009-11-23T11:35:00.001-08:00

Still happy! Still cute as can be! Still likes the camera! What more could we ask for? I love

month 9 so far! He just keeps getting better!

... now I have to go.... he's yelling at me. ;)

"MAAAA-MA!!!" (his new favorite word)